Sunday Morning in New Diary

I had a very bad day yesterday. Depression and anxiety were very high. I felt so anxious all day. I wasn’t thinking about anything in particular. I just felt very bad. I took an anxiety pill yesterday and that helped somewhat. Kelly my worker came yesterday. I was beyond tired. I didn’t do too much of anything but sit in front of the computer. Towards the end of the day I started to read. I managed to read one chapter in my book.

I felt a little better last night. I watched a good John Wayne movie on the Western Channel. Hondo was the name of it. I must have seen that movie a million times. But it was good watching it again. I went to bed after the movie.

I had some weird dreams last night. I was dreaming about my old job at Eagle Manufacturing. I was looking for a webber so I could finish this one order. I could not find one in this dreams were two guys I used to work with. I have not seen them in over thirty years. But their images were so real and life like. It was strange

I hope today will be better. I hope I can get out of this shitty mood I’m in. I hate being like this. I hate struggling with depression and anxiety. I deal with this shit every day. It never ends. There is no frigging cure for it. I suffered from this my whole frigging life. There is no cure.

Hell with it. Hell with it all