It Was 40 Years Ago Yesterday in Day by Day

We celebrated our 40th anniversary yesterday. Our celebrations are low key now. June is a hard month for us, since it is a mixture of happy and sad. The fact that we’ve survived 40 years together without killing each other is something to cheer for, especially if you know my husband and I are complete opposites!

But there’s always Nick’s absence. He was always the first to call on Father’s Day (“Hey, Daddy-o! Hope your day is great! I love you.” The boy never, ever left the house without his last words being “I love you”. The others say “I love you” but it is sporadic. Nick was different.) and, even harder, June is Nick’s birthday month. He would have been 33 this year.

So we schedule our joy and our sorrow now. I got a bit teary yesterday, but did the usual: reminded myself to cry about it tomorrow because today was a day for joy, not sorrow.

I hate this club I’ve been shoved into, but all I can do is suck it up and keep going.

Even though it was a quiet celebration, we did go out to eat. We chose an upscale restaurant, because a card had come for Nick in the mail from them. We eat there once or twice a year because it is a bit pricey, but they’d included a coupon with Nick’s card: buy one entree and get the second for free. We figured we’d redeem it and feel that Nick treated us. The restaurant was very nice about it and honored the gift card and even put a candle in my creme brulee, so I feel as if we celebrated his birthday, too, even though it isn’t until the 20th. Even with the gift card, dinner for two was $150!

It’s part of the club rules: you celebrate what you can and you try not to dwell on what is beyond your control.

After dinner, we drove around a bit, enjoying the fact that the tourists have all gone home and traffic is much lighter. The restaurants were busy but lots of parking spots were still available and the beach parking lot was only half full! We talked about a movie, but we were feeling lethargic after the heavy meal (I had sea scallops and my husband ordered the duck), so headed home. We’re such wild and crazy kids! LOL!

Today I’m sorting the kids’ lego sets to get them ready for ebay. I only sold three pieces of Wedgewood, which disappointed, so I’m going to try a different approach. As I sort and box things up, the space clears and I feel as if I’m gaining ground. Of course, if I don’t sell it, I’ve just shifted the pile from cupboards and closets to boxes and the joke is on me. I’ll let you know how it goes.

Lots of rain in Florida these days, which is good for the drought, but I miss my Florida sunshine. At least the fires are out!