Chilibow in Book Four: Ichi-no-Tani 2017

Back to the Monday. And I agreed to cover a hearing for White Boss. Which means I was in the office around 7:45; in Court around 8:10. Luckily, my back has healed well. Still have the incision wounds, of course, but… unless I’m simply missing it, they aren’t bleeding out or becoming infected.

I do have to say, as many things are wrong with my relationship and my wife in general; I was very thankful that she was okay with me taking it easy this weekend. I don’t know if that is sad or not, though. Like… I had a minor surgery on Friday and I’m relieved that Wife did not ask me to do more than unload the dishwasher. I’ll take it as a good thing. After all, better to reflect and be happy that Wife wasn’t furious for me “laying about”. And layabout I did. Saturday, I ran errands with Wife for a few hours and then… just… crashed out. Sunday, I had intended to help out around the house a great deal more but around 4:30, I suddenly felt like I had come over with a sudden fever. Just… felt terrible. Couldn’t even so much as read PB or write an e-mail. So I went to bed. And woke up at 9. I felt a great deal better but… 4 hours of sleep in the middle of the day! That is more than I’ve been getting at night some of these past few evenings.

So, I come in to work. Super early. Unlock the door, turn on all of the lights, go to court… Client never shows up. Super. Not even my client and a simple arraignment seems to be too much. So, I text my boss that his client will have a warrant out for his arrest. Come back to the office… no body there. None of the attorneys from any of the firms; Chinese Assistant isn’t even at the desk. ::shrug:: Oh well? I guess. I’ll just… sit around here, trying to figure out what I might be able to do that could possibly be billable.

Cuz… yeah. Even with the back surgery last week, I tried really hard to make last week THE WEEK THAT I HIT MY BARE MINIMUM EXPECTATION. All I wanted was 20.8 hours of billable work. With the exception of the week where I had a 15 hour billable day; the closest I’ve gotten to that 20.8 is 17.9! Which, in money terms, means… I would like to be making at least $624 per week (especially considering how often I’m in the office)… but the closest I’ve gotten to that so far has been a $537 week. Last week? I was so damned close and still missed it! 20.4! $612. AND yes, while I suspect many first year associates experience thin times like this… it doesn’t make me feel any better. Frankly, I’m giving myself boundaries. If, by May 2018, I’m not consistently hitting a Billable Percentage that would equal (at least) $30,000 per year… than I need to quit. No questions asked, no hesitations. Because I find it hard to believe that with my education and experience; I couldn’t be making $30,000 almost anywhere else… including working as a Comcast Phone Operator.

Though, two fun things to share.
(1) This weekend I had my radio playing while I was healing and the song “I Can Go The Distance” was playing. That song from the Disney Hercules movie. The song playing when the skinny, picked on kid commits himself to finding where he belongs no matter what. Yeah. That song used to make me cry. Honestly. Because… I felt that. I would always get this monster lump in my throat at “I would go most anywhere to find where I belong.” But this weekend, that didn’t happen. Because for the first time ever when I heard that song… I knew where it was that I had been looking for. Law School. I know I say this a lot but it was that important. Yeah, I don’t know if this Attorney thing is going to work out. I don’t know if I may end up a sad lonely dog in a kennel too old to be adopted. But the journey that led me HERE… at least part of that journey was worth EVERYTHING. Because I finally found where I belong.
(2) I ran into a Defense Attorney that worked in Tiny Town. Hadn’t seen him since the move so he caught me up to speed on the goings ons up there. I was correct, I was not replaced. The County realized that a competent full time attorney was sufficient to prosecute a county of less than 5,000 people. But, in bad news, the Idiot Magistrate was replaced by Another Idiot Magistrate. So… being here, despite the massive financial issues, still seems preferable from a professional stand point. Though… I still admit… pinning/working my ass off to get to $30,000 still seems like an idiot move considering I was making $60,000 in Tiny Town.

But… that’s an interesting thing, isn’t it. Things I Want include (1) happier, healthier wife; (2) happier, healthier marriage; (3) job satisfaction; (4) a house. And… I figured moving away from Tiny Town would be a big part of all of that. It hasn’t been. So I think I’m putting my faith on money for that. Because… Wife? Whatever her deal; money will at least make it easier to fix. Our marriage? If money can’t fix it, it may not be fixable. And the rest is all job related and money related by virtue of definition.

In a more Funny But Not: Here is cracked.com’s 18 Ways Politics Has Ruined Everyday Interaction