Hen Party in Diary

So it’s about time I got writing about this hen party I went to last month. 12 girls on a rampage in Blackpool. Most of us there only knew one or two of the others; I only knew the hen and one other lady. And we had a blast. They’re all a bunch of nutcases and had a great time.

The first night we went to the North Pier and saw a comedian whose entire act was just taking the piss out of the audience. He saw me eating a salad sandwich that I had bought from behind the bar and he got me up on stage. “You’re going on a hen party, what do you want to eat? Oooh just a salad for me thanks. You need to get yourself to Burger King like these fat bastards here!” gesturing to some large people on the front row. Then, as he sent me away, he undid my bra, with one hand, through my clothes! Even I can’t do that.

He also got Lou, the hen, on stage and grilled her about her sex life. “If your fiance asked you how many men you’d slept with, what you say?” Lou says “About five.” He replies “You lying bastard! It’s two isn’t it! Trying to make out you’re more experienced than you are.” Lol it was quite amusing.

So then we went dancing and something kicked off. One of the girls, Amie, was kissing a man she’d just met. Then this man was talking to another girl. Lisa from our group went charging up to him going “Are you kidding me? Are you having a laugh? You’re cheating on my friend!” Lisa doesn’t even know Amie, and she only met the bloke five minutes ago! Cheating on her, lol. Then everyone started yelling and storming out, until it was just me and Mini left dancing, wondering what happened. People were crying in the toilets, all sorts of drama. Every single hen night I’ve been on, there has to be.
- Someone copping off with a bloke they just met.
- Someone yelling.
- Someone storming off in a huff.
- Someone crying in the toilets.

It’s like an unwritten rule. This is why I generally don’t have female friends, I hate all this drama.

The second night we were there, we ended up in a club called Popworld, which was just a meat market. Men were coming up to Lisa and motorboating her, apparently it was fair game because she was wearing a low cut top. Men just randomly coming up and dancing, grabbing you, trying to chat you up. I hated it, I just wanted to dance with my mates. One bloke turned around, looked at me and did a double take. Then came running up declaring “You’re the most beautiful woman I’ve ever seen. You’re stunning. Seriously, you are so beautiful” etc etc. He did have a severe case of beer goggles though, lol. He kept grabbing my hands and spinning me round. I told him I had a boyfriend and he said “That’s ok, I’ve got a girlfriend.” Well I’m sure she’ll be pleased to know you’re here, telling another woman that she’s the most beautiful woman you’ve ever seen! He was a bit annoying, but harmless and it was nice to be told I’m beautiful. When I left, he looked like a wounded puppy and I thought he was going to run after me lol.

Us girls had such a good time, we’re all planning on getting together again, having a pamper night or a night at the pub. Well, here are a load of photos. We all dressed as superheroes on the second night, I was Supergirl.

Meanwhile…

In the club.

Batgirl vs Supergirl.

St. Paddy’s Day! I can’t actually remember these two photos being taken, and I wasn’t even that drunk!

Harley Quinn, Supergirl and She-Ra.

This is now my Facebook profile photo.

I’m wearing glasses, no one knows who I am.

Everyone!

A bus full of Phils, the groom.

The beautiful English seaside!

I have no idea what’s going on here.

Jagerbomb glasses, and the hen :o)

Last updated April 25, 2017