Steuben's Charge in poetry

Friedrich von Steuben.
Friedrich Wilhelm Ludolf Gerhard Augustin von Steuben,
that’s a foreign name, isn’t it.
That’s a scary immigrant refugee kind of name.
Kinda name that would make old Drumpf the Lame
have his last three hairs all stand-up on end.
Friedrich von Steuben.

But if you’re in Utica, there’s a statue of him still.
Go look up on the Parkway by the Zoo sometime
though I doubt that most of you will.

And yes, an immigrant was that Steuben.
He was one of those refugee men.
He was also one of the greatest military minds
at least in Europe at least for his time
maybe one of the greatest military minds ever.
He was also gay.
Proudly unabashedly gay.
So even though he was the most brilliant commander
his time and his place had ever seen
he kept getting blocked in his progress or
worse hustled out of anywhere he had been
because in the 1700s nearly everyone was
almost as homophobic as Mike Pence
so despite his many talents he was told
to get the hell hence
time and time again
Friedrich von Steuben.

Now the last time America was illegally ruled
by a madman born into more money than God
wearing a fucking terrible wig
living in a series of collapsing castles back East
they were trying to fight back like hell
they were trying to resist and it wasn’t going well
it was an army of irregular hicks
who mostly knew guns for the odd turkey hunt
were tenant farmers who could barely spell their own names
with their talent for tactics being much the same
and so Benjamin Franklin
didn’t care if he wanted to sleep with two or three men
Franklin had laid three hundred women that year
we wouldn’t judge he just knew he needed a genius
he didn’t care what you did with your penis
so he talked George Washington into phoning a friend
raising the money for a boat they could send
they didn’t care he was born that way or that he was foreign
liberty was failing and they needed Steuben.

And the immigrant Friedrich von Steuben
the refugee Freidrich von Steuben
the tactical genius oppressed for how he loved
he stepped off that boat in gaudy firs, brother
with a few of his lovers and his precious little dog
and he whipped the Resistance right into shape.
They were farmers with blunderbusses
they were using their bayonets to cut up their lunches
and he taught them how to fight
he drilled them into shape
he taught them their positions
and if both of those were double-meanings
the Revolution didn’t care
because he was here and the soldiers listened.
He trained George Washington’s honor guard
how it was to be resistin’
and then they taught others
and those others taught others
and we beat those bastards back
we beat that born rich castle man with his shitty wig
until he had to quit all blue-and-black
and for a while
we were freer than anyone has ever been
because of the oppressed immigrant refugee
Friedrich von Steuben.
And they gave him a houses in New Jersey and Remsen
because the dude could do the job the best
who cares about an accent
or that he happened to love other men?
And he’s buried just north of Utica
the revolution’s hero
Friedrich Wilhelm Ludolf Gerhard Augustin von Steuben.

So drive to the Utica Parkway
and salute that statuette, all right?
Then go hug an immigrant
because the oppressed and the displaced
are who we are tonight
and they are why we fight!
And baby they are why we’ll win again
because who or whatever you happen to be
tonight we’re all Friedrich von Steuben.

Last updated March 17, 2017