Angry in Adventures of New baby and family

I’m upset....very!!
How can I be with someone whom treats me as bad as my SO does. Today seems like the last straw. He blames me for everything: For not “sharing”- I don’t give him enough. He lives off me, eats here and I pay for his car insurance. I pay everything. I even paid for all of us to go to Florida as his father died. He doesn’t pay for anything. Doesn’t help with one dime. Tells me I owe him a car but wants me to pay for it. He gets $800 ssi MONEY.... EVERY MONTH. Has NO bills! Will not help out one bit. I barely can work as he doesn’t want to watch his own child. Too much trouble you see. He’s getting an inheritance.. like I would see any of it. Last year he ended up in the psych ward. He blames me for not being there when the baby was born. That I did it on purpose. Then mentions I was attention seeking after a very difficult pregnancy and that why he ended up in the psych ward
That last statement makes me sad.
Very sad. I write about it in here as this is my outlet. I don’t go broadcasting it a lot to people and the whole story really is something.

Last year he was so horrible that I had to call crisis services and they came and got him. He was in there for 3 weeks During which his last son was born. He called my father daily from the psych ward and called him a child molester. He flipped out at me when i told him the baby would be born that week.

Before they took him there was one day I talked to crisis services and when I was on the phone with them he jumped on talked to them. They were so concerned they sent the cops out. The Cops came and he convinced them I was crazy as I was pregnant and hormonal. I, when I’m pregnant don’t have that problem. I sighed.... this was not going to go well. They knew he wasn’t right(crisis services) did follow up (few days later) and brought the police with them (not the same police that came out with them.)

It just hurts.... he wasn’t there and was making fun of a serious situation for me.

That week I got a call from the doctor whom stated the MRI said I had placenta accreta. This is a very serious situation were the placenta grows into the uterus and when they remove the placenta can cause internal hemorrhaging: meaning I could bleed to death,
Minimum :have to be transfused, have my uterus removed, bladder repaired…etc.

I didn’t really tell him the extent of the seriousness just that he was going to be born that week. He was too mentally gone to discuss it.

This problem was on top of the fact my water broke early and that they were certain he was not going to make it or be a micro-preemie that he knew about. I, really to this day ,don’t know if he knows all that went on when he was in the psych ward or how serious it was. He just knows I and the doctor call him the miracle baby. I’ve barely mentioned it to anyone that this is how it ended. I don’t really talk about the c-section. Although I did write about it in here. It did effect me for a month or 2 after. ( gave me bad dreams).

It just hurts even though I know he’s not mentally right that he would say that to me. To bring it up.
Also knowing that when he did come home he didn’t bond right away with him. He felt like every time he saw him reminded him of the pysch ward and that the baby was broken. He wasn’t perfect. How could he have a son that wasn’t perfect. Alex came home with casts on his legs for clubbed feet. Clubbed feet that he got from my water breaking early. The only longer term problem he had....

Attention seeking....yeah. that’s me, not sharing that’s me too.