Today was awful. in Since OD is shutting down....

Alright so I’m scheduled 3 days next week. Just 3. Well, my boss left the GM a note and what not. I walk into work this morning and this guy ripped me a new one as I was clocking in right in front of a co-worker. He continued to ride my ass all day and at one point, even threw some full force up against the fucking wall. I text my boss a super long text but she hasn’t responded which probably means they are trying to figure out what to do. I am not going to continue being mistreated and after dealing with it for so long from another manager, I’m not going to take this shit lying down anymore.

He of course wouldn’t let us eat or take breaks and that really pushed me over my limit because i’m a diabetic and I’m pregnant. He’s known for over a week that I’m pregnant and still chose to be cruel. My co-worker that witnessed him rip me a new one emailed our boss this morning. I didn’t know until after so I’m guessing I’ll walk into another shit storm on Tuesday when I get there due to the email and the text I sent my boss. If this guy continues to make a shitty work place for me, I’m going to let him know that I’ve been there for 3 years and watched more than enough managers end up a notch on the fucking wall and he’ll be no different.

I had the worst day I’ve had in a long time and I honestly couldn’t wait to get out of there so I could come home and lock myself in my house and not talk to a fucking soul. My brother still won’t give me the time of day so as of this time, no one in my family knows I’m pregnant. It’s really frustrating but I’ve done what I can to reach out for almost 2 weeks now to either hear an excuse or be blown off. I fucking hate all of them. I was there for him when all 4 of his kids were born, I’ve always helped him in any way he’s ever needed and the one time I need him, he just doesn’t fucking care.

I’m still feeling really good about blocking Eric. I am extremely grateful for all of the amazingly supportive notes I’ve gotten from everyone, it really has helped. He’s already shown me way too much crazy. I’m sure there’s people that aren’t going to agree with me shutting the door on him contacting me regardless of what he says to me but all I know is I’m not going to spend the rest of my life fighting with him either. I’m sorry that he’s emotionally off and can’t handle anything like a mature, sane human being but I’m not going to take the wrath of it anymore. I’ve let more than enough go with this guy and I just refuse to keep doing it. There’s absolutely no fucking excuse for him to say he hopes something bad happens to me and I should get an abortion.

Eric needs a lot of mental help and I am never going to allow him to be alone with a baby until he gets it. I just can’t help but feel that if he doesn’t have patience for me, how the fuck would he for a child?! Especially when they are tiny and sometimes inconsolable? My trust in this person has escaped me. I honestly never thought he’d say anything mean about the baby and now that he has, it makes me super glad that he’s out of state and I hope he’ll honestly just forget about the baby and I because again, I refuse to quarrel with him forever and that’s all it’s ever going to be. He threatened me the other day about not filing for child support or keeping the baby from him and everyone’s telling me that I won’t have a choice on child support and I’ll arrange for visitation.

I just resent him trying to make me feel like I don’t have any say in what happens with my own child. He’s done nothing but try and dictate to me how things are going to be since I told him I was pregnant and that’s another reason why I’ll never be with him. I’m a grown woman and I’ve paid all my own bills for 11 years so I’m absolutely not going to take orders from someone!!! He should probably worry about his own situation. He doesn’t have any stability in his life whatsoever. No money in the bank, no place to call his own, no car…nothing. I truly wish him the best but I am going to do what I have to for my child and myself, even if that means keeping him as far away as I can.

Anyways, I’m going to take a bath and go to bed. I just want to sleep and forget this terrible day ever happened.