Say It Isn't So in Everyday Ramblings
- Jan. 11, 2014, 11:03 a.m.
- |
- Public
Unlike the rest of the Northern Hemisphere we are actually getting our first sustained winter storm coming in just about now. There was an inch and a half of water on the big street near me on Wednesday evening so clearly we are due to replenish our snow pack (much needed) in big weather events as climate change unfolds.
So after a carefully worded nudge to Mr. Fine China midweek, we started making plans for getting together this weekend and going for another birdy walk but this time up near where he lives in Washington. The weather is not cooperating with our original plans so I unexpectedly have the better part of today free.
I am glad to share a small portion of it with you all.
Although clearly my oldest sister was pleased to see me during her Christmas week visit to Kes and Most Honorable (and she loved my gift, a wonderful warm washable Martha Stewart throw that I got at a ridiculous discount a few days before Christmas at Macy’s) she seemed distant and sort of out of it.
Her eyes have been swelling and her Macular Degeneration galloping forward and I just assumed she was grappling with the incredible sadness and difficulty of knowing she is losing her sight.
Thursday evening as I was getting ready to draw my yoga class for the next day I checked my email and was shocked to see an email from her to both Kes and me saying that her colonoscopy had gone well but that they have found a large mass in a place you don’t want to have any sort of mass for any period of time.
I didn’t know she was having the test and I didn’t know she had been having problems, and discomfort, apparently things were not working as they are meant to for months and months. She knew something was wrong…
The biopsy results will be in early next week but she is already scheduled for an appointment with both an oncologist and a surgeon next week as well.
Eeek!
She is just three weeks from her 70th birthday and only ten years older than me.
She is actually relieved to know. Now there is a plan and there will be steps to address this issue one after another. Her doctors and hospital are ridiculously close, just a few blocks away and she lives with her daughter (who will need to start being home more often).
I am so glad in retrospect (and a little jealous) that she was able to retire from work early. She’s had a good run of it the last 10 years and has been able to be a critical and hugely influential part of Miss E.’s life, which is what she has wanted. She researched and published many fascinating articles on the history of Seattle, particularly its architectural history. She has supported all sorts of arts and been engaged and quite active in the urban community garden movement.
But now that is all changing.
My sister is an extraordinary person. I admire her so much. And she drives me completely insane in a way that was a precursor to my relationship with Mr. Finch. Without learning how to interact with her I never would have had a chance with him. (They liked each other too, which makes me laugh.)
She makes no attempt whatsoever to be “normal”. She will face this all straight on practically and with a brutal honesty that is already a bit bracing. (This is a trait she shared with Mr. Finch.) Her son lives near by as well and can help out.
As a family we are all trying to absorb the news. My siblings and I are unusually close for grown ups and I am so grateful for that because we all enrich each other’s lives with current communication and that irreplaceable shared past.
Mr. Fine China is coming down to get me in the morning tomorrow. We’ll spend the day together. He is very excited to show me his beloved house that he bought after the most recent divorce. He lights up when he talks about it.
We are so different! I don’t know if we will be able to find a way to be together. All the challenges from before are in play (except now I am not consulting for him) but we are both more mature and worn out so maybe we can make this work.
In the meantime he makes me laugh and enjoys my company so I am not going to pass up this opportunity for hands on human interaction and distraction. No way.
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