Friday Morning in New Diary

Went to bed early last night. I got up around 3 today. Had my coffee. I finished reading that one book History of American Law by Lawrence M Friedman. I am glad to be done with it. That book was so damned boring in parts and so hard to understand I can’t even remember most of what I read Most of it was way over my head. In any case I am finished with the law book . Next book is Creation of the American Republic by Gordon S Wood. This will be bit more easier to read and digest.

Depression wise I am doing better this morning. I am not thinking bad thoughts My case manager called me yesterday afternoon. I told her what has been going on. She asked me what I I could do to help myself. I didn’t tell her this but when I get in those states I feel so frigging helpless. Nothing I can do seems to help

But that is wrong. Writing about it seemed to help. I wrote two entries yesterday. It was an outlet . After writing about my thoughts and feelings I did feel a bit better. I also called Healthways. When my case manager called me yesterday afternoon I was doing fine. Nevertheless I asked her if she could pay a visit . She is going to be here at 1:30 this afternoon. This also made me feel better .

I don’t understand it. Like I said I was sitting at my kitchen table reading and drinking coffee. I was feeling fairly good. Then all of a sudden my mood dropped. I felt it was the end of the world. What scared me was this sudden drop of mood. It came over me so fast. I don’t get these sudden mood changes too often . I usually get in a down mood and then it lingers and lingers. Then it eventually passes and I feel fine.

I don’t know. All I know is that I am having a good morning. I am going hopping with Chocolatechip. We are going to Wal Mart this morning. All I plan to get is coffee, creamer and a case of pop. I am looking forward to getting out of the buil/ding for a while.