Trek Films Reranked (YET AGAIN). in Whey and Sonic Screwdrivers.
- Aug. 11, 2016, 2:49 p.m.
- |
- Public
Tastes change. After four viewings of Star Trek Beyond, I think I’m ready to rank the thirteen films. But then I realized: There’s now enough nuTrek films to really separate them into three series. (TOS, TNG, AOS) These lists are completely subjective and totally biased. Explicitly: I think Voyage Home and First Contact are overrated, and Final Frontier and Insurrection/Nemesis are underrated. To that end, I will simply ask myself: What would Timmy rather watch? I have no doubt my momentary tastes will shift slightly by the time Star Trek 14 rolls around. But for now…
TOS:
1: Wrath of Khan
2: Undiscovered Country
3: Search for Spock
4: Final Frontier
5: Motion Picture
6: Voyage Home
(I usually flip the order the Final Frontier and Motion Picture, but I’m so fucking amused that they shot “god” in the face.)
TNG:
1: Nemesis
2: Insurrection
3: First Contact
4: Generations
(It took me a decade to get over Data’s death, as there was no Search For Data movie. “Plinkett” has already torn apart all of the TNG films, and he’s totally right. Star Trek Generations is the stupidest movie ever made. Anyway, First Contact makes no sense; Insurrection is the closest that feels to a TNG episode, even if there’s an episode where Picard does THE EXACT OPPOSITE. Strangely, Nemesis has aged well. Shinzon’s motivations are nebulous but it’s still an entertaining watch.)
AOS:
1: Beyond
2: The Star Trek
3: Into Darkness
That’s the easy part. Now to unify the list. (I’M MAKING THIS UP AS I GO ALONG.) Again, I ask myself, “What would I rather watch?”
1: Wrath of Khan
2: Undiscovered Country
3: Search for Spock
4: Beyond
5: The Star Trek
6: Final Frontier
7: Nemesis
8: Insurrection
9: Motion Picture
10: Voyage Home
11: First Contact
12: Into Darkness
13: Generations
Opinions change. We’ll see how I feel in three years when Star Trek 14 comes out. Here’s hoping they do the obvious cash-grab of tossing Zachary Quinto with a goatee on a poster. C’mon. Star Trek Mirrored? SHUT UP AND TAKE MY MONEY.
(Edit 9/2/16)
1: Wrath of Khan
2: Undiscovered Country
3: Search for Spock
4: Beyond
5: The Star Trek
6: Final Frontier
7: Nemesis
8: Motion Picture
9: Voyage Home
10: Insurrection
11: First Contact
12: Into Darkness
13: Generations
I gotta acknowledge how shitty insurrection was, and how awesome Motion Picture was.
Last updated September 02, 2016
gattaca ⋅ August 11, 2016
Recently, I got Robert Wise's ST TMP director's cut on DVD (alas, no BluRay yet). Excellent re-editing, DTS encoded soundtrack.
Story-wise, it was a little weak, Shatner overacted and Douglas Trumbull was brought in at the last minute too re-do the effects at enormous cost, but the presentation in a dark room on a 55" Samsung and 5.1 DTS, it is theatrically stunning.
It far eclipses the original 1979 release.
I've not seen Beyond yet.
I bow reverently to Cumberbatch in Sherlock but I think he was miscast as Khan.
Timmy™ gattaca ⋅ August 11, 2016
Jerking off to KHAN so early was a mistake. Even if they had made him seem ambigious and saved him for another flim, fine. Sigh.
Fawkes Gal ⋅ August 12, 2016
WHAT? Star Trek We Got Us Some Whales ranked LOWEST for TOS films? I cannot look you in the eye any more. ;-)
The Search for Spock is so outrageously Spirky. It's kind of adorable just for that.
Have you seen the reworked version of the Motion Picture? I kind of liked it.
I've not seen any of the TNG films, are they worth it?
Timmy™ Fawkes Gal ⋅ August 12, 2016
"That one with the whales" ends up being overrated in my eyes. Scotty gives them the formula for Transparent Aluminum, but what casual person remembers that? He just DID A FUNNY.
Deforest Kelley brought his A-game to Search for Spock. Little credit is given there. THEY STOLE THE ENTERPRISE. Nevermind the Enterprise death scene, but you really can't top stealing the Enterprise.
....I kind of like the Slow Motion Picture as it is.
The TNG films simply can't compare to the seven seasons they had. Whereas TOS got lucky Wrath of Khan worked.
Fawkes Gal Timmy™ ⋅ August 12, 2016
That one with the whales was the one I grew up with, so I can't help the fond memories. :-)
The stealing the enterprise scene is great, and bad-ass Uhura. :-)
Timmy™ Fawkes Gal ⋅ August 12, 2016
GET IN THE CLOSET.
I wish she had more scenes in the movie, but that moment was definitely hers.
I never saw Voyage Home until I was already deep into my Trekkiedom as a kid. So, it was just something I was watching through. And it felt really weird. (Not in a bad way.) And I wasn't aware of how panned Final Frontier was, so I enjoyed it as it was.
Kirk doesn't want his pain taken away, he needs his pain. Forgive me for relating to that.