counting down the minutes in 2013-2014

Aaron just left.

Stuff happened.

I need someone to take me gently by the hand and lead me to whatever store sells big girl pants.

He got in Thursday night at about 2am. My dad was long asleep and snoring. We kissed, we admired my dinky star and my ancient tree, and then we went straight to bed and to sleep because we're old and my dad was in the next room. (Except no really, we're just old.) Dad and Aaron hung out for a bit in the morning (I was the last one up, as usual) and then Dad drove home. Aaron and I commenced to... doing nothing, really. We ate leftover steakhouse and watched bowl games and messed around on our laptops. He played video games and I dozed off in his lap, the usual.

Saturday was a big day. First, we accidentally broke Sheppy's heart.

See, I needed to take Shep out to pee before we left on errands, and there was trash from dinner Friday that needed to go out before it started to stink. So Aaron took the trash and I took the dog, and we split up on the sidewalk. Sheppy stood on the hill and watched Aaron go, straining to follow, until Aaron was out of sight. Then he deflated, reluctantly peed, and reluctantly walked back to the door, his tail down. 30 seconds later, Aaron walked back in, and Sheppy lit up like it was Christmas morning. We had to console the dog, who thought he'd been abandoned, before leaving.

We loaded up in the car and went to the mall, my late grandmother's diamond rings in my pocket. I unwittingly parked next to the preferred jewelry store. (IT'S A SIGN.) We walked in, met with a really excellent consultant who fully endorsed using family heirloom diamonds no matter how much he would like to "sell a whopper behind the glass." He was surprised that I'm not the driving force--I have the diamonds. That's it. The consultant and Aaron actually kicked me out of the store for about five minutes while they talked pricing/styles/whatever. (Aaron only told me that much later.) I prowled the outside of the store or stood quietly by myself like some kind of exile hobo until they summoned me back for the formal sizing (I'm a 6.75 because I have to be special, of course.) They couldn't do anything just yet, but I do have an appointment in two weeks for a thing they're doing, where they'll have people whose entire jobs is to match diamonds and settings and tell you what can or can't be done with your stuff. You can get it done right then and there if you want.

Yeah this isn't terrifying at all.

Also, I'm going by myself. Erp.

Walking around, we found a dollar bill (!!) outside another jewelry store (...) and used it to buy a big cookie. We bought shoes--he needed work shoes, and my black heels bit it awhile ago. I found another shiny pair of black hooker heels for $10. Winning. They are maaaaybe a bit high to wear to formal, classy events (by like, half an inch maybe, not that bad) but I will wear them anyway. My last heels were on the short side. I'm compensating.

After the mall came Barnes & Noble. We found two books that we'd like to read together, Cinder and Insomnia. He's not quite the YA hound that I am, so I appreciated his sacrifice, haha. He actually picked out Insomnia in the first place.

Post B&N came Publix, to buy dinner stuff. And while in the car, he posted to Facebook, because he is a total troll, "That conniving moment when you and the jeweler kick your girlfriend out of the store for a few moments." 18 people have liked it. My parents have discussed it. He cackled for the next day and a half about putting everyone we know on Engagement Watch during the holidays with no intention of following up anytime soon. (The jeweler, however, was completely supportive and understanding when I said "it's the mindgame stage. He's having fun and I refuse to get excited.") Heather informed me that I'm at Emergency Engagement Alert.

Because really, this whole engagement thing is his thing. He's got higher standards than I do. He won't do anything stupid or tacky. I am totally hands-off. Aside from supplying almost 2 carats of diamonds to pick between, I have zero input in the ring, timing, anything. (This is so stress relieving.) And I like it this way. I don't want to be nagging or sending "friendly reminders" via jewelry store or my friends, or leaving circled catalogs on the table, or generally henpecking and manipulating into getting my way. I don't want to demand that he set aside x paychecks to pay for something. It's his budget, his decision, his timing, his style preference. I'm the one picking out his ring later. It's a gift, not a Daddy-buy-me-this-car.

I think it was Saturday, too, that he gave me the present from his mom. It's a fondue set, with chocolate and cheese. And it's purple! As we investigated Sunday night, I asked if this was the first joint gift. He said probably.

(Can you guess the theme of this trip?)

Sunday night we made Hamburger Helper or some kind of equal fake-cheese-high-sodium dish. We added copious seasoning and watched Justice League episodes on Netflix, including some musical episode that absolutely delighted me. There was also a documentary on the Japan earthquake (with guest appearances by Christchurch) and finally, we stumbled across a 'horror' movie called Spiders. It looked bad, so we were setting it up, and I recognized that the lead actor was also the lead in Ice Spiders. It was on. We tried to do the cheese fondue, but the cheese that came with the set refused to melt. It snapped and crackled in the microwave and was never, ever not a solid. We gave up and just drank Dew and watched spiders attack New York. The movie lasted forever and we staggered up to bed at like 2:30.

Where we promptly had the giggles for about 30 minutes. It was baaaad. I'm talking middle school girl, bad. Uncontrollable giggle fits and independently attacking body parts and life re-evaluating. And then we moved our heads closer together, because someone wanted to kiss someone, and someone banged skulls with someone and we're not sure who's to blame there, but his eye socket hit my temple and set us off again. He didn't talk in his sleep that night, which breaks the streak of calling me a goof in his sleep at 2 nights. (The second night was "I love you, goof," and he has zero memory of this at all. D'aww.) And I dreamed of zombies for what felt like all night. I'd wake up and go right back to the same dream. It got really old.

We slept in today, pretty late. There were cuddles and he took Sheppy out for me, because he always does when he's over and gets out of bed first. We got Chick Fil A and then cuddled on the couch to let the food settle, which also got pretty silly after awhile. I learned that odds are we'll be engaged by the family reunion this summer and he intends to throw me to the squealing wolves, and hahaha that will not happen. I will cling like a spider monkey and he will suffer along with me. He finally packed up, Sheppy got sad again, and I helped him carry everything out to the car. We had an inadvertent, slightly awkward standing-in-the-chilly-parking-lot discussion about my housing when I move down there (fingers so very crossed) this summer, and how unless he wants a year+ engagement (does not), to keep an eye out for places for me to move into that will satisfy both of us or have short leases or great deals or something.

Then he left his free coffee coupon in the apartment, we went back, we or I got hollered at by someone, there was more kissing, and he left. I waited about 45 minutes before taking Sheppy out again, because otherwise he'll just try to go look around the parking lot in a forlorn manner.

And I'm writing because things are getting scarily concrete and wait wait wait when did this happen oh hell.

He predicted that I'm going to spend an awful lot of time staring at my finger and contemplating how the hell a ring got there. This is not a far-flung guess. There is a large part of me going 'WHEEE' and a smaller but still significant part of me going 'wtf wtf wtf wtf this is not happening this isn't reality i'm going to wake up anytime now wtf.' They do not necessarily play nice together.
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counting down the minutes 'til my heartbeat stops
fooling myself is a full-time job

EDIT: Aaaand then this just happened:

Aaron: Grandma says hi and sends her love. <3
Me: Awww. Hi to her! Return sentiments, please. <3
Aaron: Oh, I most certainly will. She bought your engagement ring with her Christmas present (a check) to me.
Me: ALL THE LOVE
Me: Now look who's swimming in money? :P
Aaron: Irrelevant. :P
Me: I'm glad things are getting back to normal. ;)
Aaron: But yes, Grandma is getting a phone call full of love tomorrow.
Me: Please come back and pick my jaw off the floor. It's stuck.

what is this family i'm going to be marrying into
but then again, reunion at an Outer Banks mansion
i need some deep breathing exercises