Not again! in Adventures in paradise

  • May 2, 2016, 4:05 a.m.
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I’ve been awake since God-knows what even hour. It’s 5:30am now and I’ve been up for at least two hours I think. Through no fault of my own.

I was awoken by a bunch of voices coming from the loungeroom. Really bogan-like, straight-sounding voices, clearly none of which were my housemate’s.
I was like, ‘What. The. Fuck?’

Who were these people in my house??

Originally, I could hear them right outside my window, as they were drunk and loud and typical youth, really.
Listen to me go. “Get off muh lawn, ya bloody kids!” I can just see myself waving my cane at them from the porch when I’m 80.

Next thing I know, I HEAR someone rushing down the stairs to let all these people in, so either someone STAYED here when everyone went out (before I fell asleep) OR (the more-likely case), someone scaled the length of the house to the upper level and let themselve (broke) in to let everyone in. I KNOW the person who walked down the stairs wasn’t my housemate either.
I had gotten up to eat after everyone left here after predrinks earlier in the night and locked the back door, because they left THAT wide open, so they didn’t get in through there.

Then I just kept hearing more and more guys voices, talking stupid drunk shit. Then a few girls joined, as the front door was now wide open and chicks were just walking inside from the street in their heels. We have wooden floors so there’s no mistaking that sound. They were being SO loud.

So this is two weeks in a row now this has happened. Granted, both weeks have been long weekends, so obviously my housemate is making the most of them. The other housemate is always away on weekends, so he misses all of this. He probably would have freaked out too if it were him, although he can hide upstairs more easily where there is less foot traffic. People have to walk past my room all the time entering and leaving the house, as I’m on the lower level, then they congregate outside, yapping away right outside my window. I thought someone was gonna call the cops, but I guess my neighbours were feeling nice for some reason. It was a different story a few years ago when one of my housemates had this extremely screaming-loud friend, and we would get visits from the neighbours demanding to talk to them lol. So I guess it’s not as bad as those days were.

Still, waking up to strange voices coming from the loungeroom and overhearing conversations like, “What street is this?” made me feel a bit intimidated now hiding away in the darkness in my room. I almost went out there and demanded to know who the fuck they were. I guess any normal person would have! But I’m not normal am? Plus they were all drunk and here’s sober me, just woken up because of all this, walking out in my sparkly underwear to tell a whole heap of strange kids off for being in my house.
At one stage, one of them even opened the door to my room! It opened about halfway and then they closed it again. Probably one of them thinking it was the bathroom or something. I don’t even want to THINK about what that looks like right now. I could go into a tangent about how whenever all these people are over, they use up all my toilet paper, but really, that’s trivial shit. Haha, shit. get it?
Then I hear some other guy rock up and he’s like (to the people yapping away outside), “Are we just walking into the house?”
Finally. Someone with half a brain decided something wan’t right here.
Too fucking right it wasn’t!

I was actually just about to text Nick, when I heard him open the front door. It seemed like he was as surprised as I was to find people in the house. Some girl was screaming at how much she loved him. I already know Nick’s a real social butterfly. People either love him or hate him, but most people love him because he really knows how to hold a conversation. Even now as I’m writing this, he’s out in the lounge chatting to some chick who has hung around, now that all of the more drunken ones have taken off. It must be that post-alcohol D&M time of the morning. Lord knows I’ve had a couple of those over the years.

I was a bit bad before, but not so much at the moment. The thing that pissed me off was strangers being in the house (again) when he wasn’t here (a BIG no-no in my landlord’s eyes. Nick would be out on his arse if he tried that when Andrew was home). And then I heard smashing glass, so I’m probably going to go out there when the sun comes up to find some of my glasses smashed. I just hope they weren’t mind that smashed. I only have the one nice glass I like anyway, and it didn’t sound like ceramics, so I hope my coffee mug from the UK is okay.

Haha, listen to me. Worried about my UK coffee mug, holed up in my room whilst my housemate actually has a life.

I know they know I’m here though. The lovely cough has decided to rear it’s head again.

I just keep thinking now things like, if I wasn’t hear and actually had a life (because I’m still not completely better yet), I wouldn’t have even known this had all happened. I wouldn’t have known strangers had basically made themselves at home because none of the housemates would have been here.
But I was home. The strange voices woke me.
At least the front door wasn’t just left open like it was LAST week. Well, at least not until someone broke in and THEN left it open for people to just waltz in off the street.

Clearly I will be saying something to Nick when I see him (and given that it’s now 6am and he’s still up yakking, I doubt that will be all day). I’ll probably be all ‘cool’ about it. “So, who were all those people making themselves at home in our lounge, huh?”


Last updated May 02, 2016


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