Annoying Entry is Annoying in Diary

I’m a bit annoyed with the roller derby training team this month. Normally it’s Mondays for Alphas and Betas with concentration on Alphas, Wednesdays especially for Betas and Fridays for Fresh Meat (new people), so, me being a Beta, I go on Mondays and Wednesdays. This month they’ve decided to let Fresh Meat have a load more sessions for some reason. They had last Wednesday, last night (Monday) and tonight (Wednesday) is Fresh Meat testing.

If they pass the test, they’ll be one step closer to becoming a Beta, which we desperately need as we currently only have five active Betas and ideally need at least 12. So fair enough they’re testing so we can have some new Betas, but I’m a bit annoyed about the way they’ve gone about it.

I’m paying a monthly sub which works out that I need to go six times a month to get my money’s worth. This month there are only four sessions that I’m eligible for, so I’m losing out there. Why couldn’t they do the testing on Friday night, which is Fresh Meat’s designated night? What’s even more annoying is that they didn’t even tell us about tonight, I only found out by chance when I overheard someone say it. I asked on the Facebook page, trying to be polite saying I think I missed the update, is there a calendar anywhere? And our head of training replied back with “We thought you Betas might like to have some potential new team members.” YES! YES WE DO! But my point is that they’re taking over all our sessions this month and we weren’t even told about it. If I hadn’t have found out by chance, I would have rocked up tonight, ready for Beta training, only to find that I can’t actually skate because the Fresh Meat are testing. Communication, people!

I don’t blame you if you didn’t read all that as it’s incredibly boring to anyone who isn’t involved, I just wanted to have a rant.

Already in a bad mood anyway as it’s been crazy busy at work for some reason today. And some people are forgetting to wrap up their phone calls for over 30 minutes so I’m getting calls for contracts that aren’t even my own, and most of these calls are taking about an hour to sort out.

ALSO, I heard a report on the radio this morning talking about a study taken with middle aged people. The middle aged people they asked are 35 or older. I’m 35 in six months, I never really thought of myself as middle aged! But now it’s making me think I could be halfway through my life and I’ve not even started doing anything with it yet. Sure, I could die tomorrow or I could die in 50 years. But hearing that I’m middle aged wasn’t what I wanted. I do tend to obsess quite a lot about my mortality. When Facebook shows me daily memories from last year, two years ago, three, four, five years ago, all I can think about is how much older I am and how much closer to death I am than when these things happened. Sometimes I wonder what’s the point in being alive if we all just die one day and the whole struggle has been for nothing. I have never been suicidal, by the way, I just have these sorts of morbid thoughts far too frequently and can’t stop it. Does anyone else have these thoughts or do I have a problem?

Thinking of good things, need to chill out.
It’s New Car Day tomorrow.
Roller derby mini tournament on Sunday.
Mam and Dad are visiting on Monday.
The sun is shining.
Holiday in Spain in five weeks.
Download Festival in seven weeks.

Aaand relax.