Falling Again 04-01-2013 in Out in the Open

Falling Again Monday, April 01, 2013

I have been seeing Lily's father a lot lately. Lily's father C, is becoming more and more involved in her life and it's been a beautiful thing. He gave one of his spare bedrooms to her so that she could have one. We have been staying the night at his house trying to get her to feel more comfortable there so that someday she will be able to stay the night all by herself. She claims she's ready, but on Friday she wouldn't go to bed with out me being in her room. However, I did get her to stay up in her room while I went down stairs with C.

Eventually I went up to bed (in Lily's room with her) to sleep. She was still awake but soon fell asleep. C snuck in and invited me to his room. I didn't pass that chance up. ;) We talked for a bit and one thing led to another...

Afterwords I went back to Lily's room so she wouldn't be frightened when she woke up. When I fell asleep I had dreams about him all night. Most really good, but one bad one too.

So the point of this rambling and explanation of current events is to admit I am falling for him again. And it makes me upset. There is like no chance for me to ever advance in any kind of relationship with him, but I can't help but be a bit hopeful. I mean, he gave me a key to his house and told me the security code to his home. When I come over I park in his garage. He wants me to sleep with him (in both ways) at night.

But there is no kissing, hand holding, or any kind of romance. sigh I can't help but wish it would grow into something more. Which is stupid, because I like living by myself. I hate sleeping next to people. I like my own space. I guess it's just the thought of feeling loved that I miss and long for.

On an unrelated note, I passed my OB/GYN board and am now Shannon RDMS!

Oh, and as for the diet that I am not on, I have not lost a total of 14.4 pounds.

Her

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congrats on passing the board and the weight loss! as for the man..it is hard not to love them. I dont know why you think it cant be more. if you put up walls it never will. [muted exposure] 4/2/2013 2:42:05 AM
Congrats on passing the board and the weight loss. I am also not on a diet and have not lost about 13 lbs, so I can relate to that! [silent driftwood]