Relocation in Random Thoughts

Warning: title (tidal?) may not be accurately indicative of events real or imagined.

No animals were harmed in the making of this entry.

Subtitled: A Procedural

Today i am cooking an Ayurvedic soup, easily digestible and assists in eliminating toxins from the body (so the recipe says). I haven’t over indulged a ton, really…and i am not a huge fan or drinking too much- my poor skin really suffers (i would be a very unattractive alcoholic). But, i did eat too much and not exercise nearly enough. I feel like i may have gained back a few of those small number of pounds i was able to lose over the past 6 months (between 7-10- i am “small” 5 ft 1, but curvy).

I had a really nice New Years. A friend from Bellingham, a long time flirt, but no consumatory follow-through, visited me because he might relocate to Portland for his job. There was a couple prongs on this visit- i have tried to consummate our flirtations in the past and thought perhaps we could while he was here (2 nights at my house) and also give him an adventure-filled sunny day in Portland. Only one prong was accomplished; a great day in the city. What i found out from two nights in my bed is that he is a great cuddler.

So, we started with a fancy new years dinner at one of portland’s finest restaurants (of many) and rang the new year in with pinball. On Jan 1 we explored a couple different neighborhoods, including a beautiful suspension bridge over the Willamette River, a brewery, the Portland Art Museum, and a video game arcade (more pinball!).

I might tell more about how i feel regarding this visit in a different entry, since this one seems to just be a procedural.

Last Monday i drove up to Seattle for a couple days, mostly to visit with my best friend, but also to see an old friend for the first time in about 7 years. I had a wonderful time!!! I almost always have a fantastic time in Seattle. I love that city, especially since i have such fond foundations of having lived there from 1997-2001. We had this crazy food, alcohol, and fun soaked Monday night. It included my best friend taking 2 tequila body shots off my (there is video, yikes!), more pinball, and 1 am sushi.

Along with that, the re-connection with my friend (we dated a long time ago) was like we had never parted. It is joyous to be around him, easy, natural, and i feel like i can be 100% me. Its a great feeling. I used to call him my Imp, his okcupid name was Imp of Chaos. He is quirky, super smart, obsessed with Burning Man, used to run a pole dancing studio, and came out in an animal hat (a fox i think). What i did not know much about was that he had been in a accident 2 years ago, fault of Seattle Metro, and has a TBI (traumatic brain injury), which really affects his ability to focus, deal with stress and anger, and get/keep a job. He used to work for Microsoft when i first met him, but he hasn’t worked in 2 years and he says that overe 2 years, his skills are dinosaur.

More on how i feel about my Imp when i am not being procedural.

Starting my break about 2 weeks ago, i drove down to Eugene to see Dios. It had been the first time in 6 weeks or so. I was feeling good about it, had not been sad in a really long time. I feel like i have come to an acceptance about us and how we arent meant to be together (none of that easeful joy like with my friend the Imp). I had a wonderful time with Dios, we ate out, spent some really good quality time together, and had some super fantastic hot sex. But when i went home, i dropped. My emotions were in a funk. I was sad. It was tough. Dios was starting to talk about the next time i was going to visit (fwb!). While i am committed to more great sex, i don’t like that feeling. So, i will. Just not soon. And my weekends get full so easily that i am not sure i will even make it down this month (ok, i will admit it. if he asks me, i will make that journey).

More on how i feel about what happened in the emotional entry. Ha.

And i haven’t even gotten into my yoga and philosophy journey. That will be for a while different entry.