xmas shopping in The Wonderland Years: 2015. Done.

well since everyone else is talking about it. um i don’t xmas shop. er i mean i make things. i used to bake muffins for my dad’s mom but, well, once i stopped visiting that stopped happening. [btw i’m still where i was w/ that].
I make cds for people well for my sister and my mom. I’ve made one for my dad this yr. I usually just give him chocolate. and I give chocolate as stocking stuffers. this yr. I’m giving my sister a drawing of a nude woman that i’ve erm, drawn, as she asked for it. [no i mean as opposed to having someone else draw it]. it’s modeled after a Matisse. I haven’t drawn in about 4 yrs., so.
and I’m giving my mom a cd of songs I’ve recorded, covers. thank you soundcloud. well she hasn’t heard me sing in yrs. and this way she can hear me whenever she wants. actually most people haven’t heard me sing and i’m way too self conscious to sing around my mom.
When she or my dad compliment me well w/ my mom I acknowledge it and i’m like ‘yeah’ and when my dad does i. don’t say anything. i don’t like it when he compliments me. i mean i’ll acknowledge it as put it just makes me uncomfortable. And the reason I don’t sing around my mom is cause I don’t want her to compliment me. and i’m like you know that would be nice for my mom to get that.
It take me, awhile to make the cd. The timing’s good like the space in between when you sing the lyrics and it’s not too over the top. [that’s actually why i don’t sing broadway a lot. as Pat once told me ‘you don’t know your own stregnth’. er in terms of singing] and it’s emotional. if there’s one thing a few people at karaoke have told me it’s that when I sing they feel something. my fave cover on there is ‘make you feel my love’. it’s so lovely and so emotional. well i think it is. ‘back to black’ is on there um a few xmas songs and. ‘i want to know what love is’. oh and ‘bring him home’ which my mom loves. which is why it’s on there.
oh i failed to mention untill now that i also give people poetry i’ve written.
so yeah. those are the gifts i’m giving.