NoJoMo Day 29-30 in Musings and Daily Events

I know I’m awful and missed the last 2 days. Whatever. Life gets in the way.

It’s just been an uneventful few days. Sunday was fun I went to see The Good Dinosaur with my cousins. It was cute. I cried a few times. I would recommend seeing it. Then I just spent the day at their house. It was nice to get away from home for a bit.

Yesterday I got my nails done (a sparkly red because Christmas) and hung out with E.

I gave him 2 blowjobs yesterday. He appreciated it and even reciprocated without be having to ask. Such a gentleman.

Yesterday was nice though with him. We ate Chinese and watched more Archer. The show is absolutely hilarious. We just laughed and laughed and cuddled. I really can’t imagine my life without E. I hope he sticks around.

M and I have barely talked since Saturday. He’s busy. I feel like I’m slowly just fading away from him. Which is a good thing I guess.

On Saturday I was a little triggered at one point and got into a melancholy mood. He noticed and thought I was mad at him. After I ate (I felt better) and he grabbed my wrist and started playing with it and was like, “Why don’t you like me today?” I could barely answer and he was like, “You still love me right?” and stopped playing with my wrist. I said of course I do and I’m really not mad at you. He laughed and said okay good.

I wonder if he chose those words specifically. Did he want to see if I’d admit to loving him? He obviously doesn’t know me very well. I’ll admit it to anyone. They just have to understand it may not be the form of love that they are expecting.

Men.

I’m freaking out about graduation. Hopefully everything goes well. I don’t even want to walk. I just want to take my last final. Breathe. And move forward with my life. What’s the point of walking?

Stupid societal traditions and expectations. Now i have to lose a day of work so I can graduate.

It’s dumb. I mean really.

Whatever.