Bloody Hell in Book Two: The Fifteenth Year of the Third Millennium of the Common Era

I acknowledge that it is likely entries like this that lose me readers. After all, complaining about the same things over and over again can be difficult to read. I don’t blame anyone for bailing. But I’ll say that… for a number of reasons… bitching about things here is really my only option at present. The two most important things in my life are simply going very very poorly and change takes time, money, and (especially lately) a certain kind of magic/miracle of which I seem to be unworthy.

Things keep going in reverse, it seems.

We got to the parents just fine on Friday. Fairly quick drive, not a lot of traffic. But after a quick dinner and the parents heading up for sleep… it wasn’t long before Wife started in on me. Nitpicking and huge attitude and… all the stuff that makes me really not like being a part of this relationship. Because I’m not going to put up with a lot of that while being guests at someone else’s home (even if it is my parents) I asked her what her deal was. Her response: “I’m just agitated and I don’t know why.” Great… so take it out on me. Super healthy.
Then all that night? Either punched awake or had my pillow yanked out from under me because she was so pissed at my snoring. Then when I sleep in on Saturday morning… she’s pissed that I slept so late.
The cold logic of it makes sense… she is likely a bit stressed being around my family… she often says being around my family makes her feel like she hasn’t done enough with her life. But… there are better ways to express one’s insecurities without concentrating it all into a Bitch Lazer to fire at me.

That Saturday, then, was a split day. The males just honestly didn’t feel like leaving the house. Football and Movies on TV… a house stuffed full with Dogs.... cooking to do.... and no way in hell were we going to put up with all the crowds and shit. Meanwhile, the women were excited to go out shopping… partially because my Aunt wanted to hock her book to different stores. But something excellent came out of it. My wife finally went in to White House Black Market… a store I’ve been recommending/suggesting/encouraging her to visit for some time. Unsurprisingly, everything she tried on looked great on her (this coming from my mother and Aunt) and Wife actually did make a purchase. A beautiful green turtleneck sweater thing. But she looked so good in the other stuff that my Mom said she’s going to try to buy lots of it for Wife’s Christmas present.

That night, though, dinner was rough. Not because of Wife or because of any family drama… but my only surviving grandparent is not in the best of health. And he doesn’t do a great deal to keep himself from getting sick or having bad reactions. He ate all of the food and drank all of the drink way too fast and wound up choking on it and then vomiting a lot of it out at the table. It was considerably uncomfortable and served to put Wife and Mom off their dinners completely. Pappy, as we call him, is fine… or as fine as he ever is… but apparently this type of event is becoming far more frequent for him.

Sunday morning was my niece’s BAPTISM! I may put pictures up, if I have any, at some point. Wife was overjoyed to see all the tiny adorable babies (7 people were getting baptized) and it is always a joy to see my little niece, brother, and sister in law. Of course… bringing all of the family together like that? People tried to split their attention between Brother’s Family and Baby and Me. “Oh, she’s adorable, thanks for inviting us” to “Rough job search, huh?” All good intentions, of course… but it certainly drove the point that I’m the only one in the family right now who doesn’t have his shit together.

The drive back to Omaha was considerably less pleasant. There was freezing rain and a lot of traffic which resulted in stretches of road where, despite the speed limit being 70 and one safely being able to go at least 65… a lot of cars going 45 out of absolute panic. Made a long and boring drive even worse.

Almost instantly through the door of the apartment, though, and Wife is back to criticizing me. I’m too fat, I don’t exercise enough, I don’t eat enough, blah blah blah blah. It was just pick pick pick pick pick pick pick pick pick. Only to be abated by her curling up with her tablet and headphones to watch Star Trek Enterprise for a while.

Don’t worry, that didn’t last. After several hours of her in her own little world doing that; she decided to try to start a fight with Microsoft over something that still hadn’t been finished satisfactorily. I get it, and tend to agree with Wife. Microsoft treated her shabbily and screwed her out of $60.00. I get why she’s upset. But sporadically trying to throw down with Microsoft via Instant Messenger once a week for three weeks hasn’t been working… so maybe try a different tactic. Y’know… as opposed to doing the same thing repeatedly expecting different results? Nope. Furious typing back and forth to their customer support team. Who, by the way, do not have a log of her previous communications with them. So… when she tells them that a customer support tech told her to “purchase X and we’ll refund it next week; I just need to make sure the connection is working” (we have a screen cap)… the Microsoft Support Individual says “We don’t have a record of that and it doesn’t sound like something anyone here would say.” So… yes… I understand that my Wife has every reason in the world to be angry and frustrated.
AT THEM.
This taking it out on me shit is not acceptable. And I would have blown up at her over it but it was past midnight… and I had to be at work at 8 am. It is fine for her to do whatever until late because her shift starts at 1 pm… but I can’t just yell back at her or even be a supportive, listening husband as she bitches and rails against whatever she can think of to focus her anger on… because I need to sleep before I go to work.

NOT that sleep was much of an option. She was already pissed off. Add in my apparently superhuman snoring? Yeah. Woken up twice between 1 am and 3 am because of my snoring. When I woke up at 3, I decided fuck it… I’ll get a glass of water and contemplate sleeping in the living room. Ironically, I didn’t need to… Wife was snoring away in the bedroom, completely out. So 3:30 am I get back to bed and get to sleep more… at least until 6 am when I need to wake up.

… at best.... this is Wife finding some release for her negativity about Retail During the Holidays. At worst… she is realizing that she wants to stay married to the family but is thoroughly sick of being married to me. Either way… I know I deserve to be treated better.