Sensitive in Random Thoughts

I slept in till 5:40, even though I went to bed late- about 10:30. Guess my body is just used to the early rise.

I have a couple weird ego boosters yesterday. I need to watch out, because attention and recognition has always been my weak spot.

1. I attended my first bdsm class, this one was just about etiquette. Pretty boring, but the group of people taking the class will be the same I will be with for the rest of the series, so it’s good to get to know people. The etiquette stuff I read up on with the he three books I bought and read this year.

So, the ego thing; when I got there and signed in with the Mistress, she said, “oh, your friend were talking (to me) about you.” Or something like that. No names mentioned, because in this environment, people’s personal privacy is of utmost importance because of the nature of sex and .... Well, I probably don’t have to get into that.

1. This week at work, we had a tough meeting with a set of parents who are kind of aggressive and tend to send pretty accusatory emails. On top of that, the mother works in the school as an assistant in the special education program her daughter is in (it’s life skills, for students whose disabilities impact them quite a bit).

So, a few weeks ago there was a meeting in which tha parents were really mean to my co-workers before I got there. I am so glad I missed that, I don’t know what my reaction would have been. I kept noticing the dad, a handsome guy heading toward 50, bright blue eyes, strong hands… and I got this feeling when he looked at me. It kind of made me uncomfortable, but then I thought perhaps I was imagining things. It turns out my little inner alert was right. We had the official meeting on Wednesday, and the parents were sitting across from me. I was just aware - looking around at a room full of people, but thinking, “Egads, carmen, why are you so self centered that you think this dad, sitting next to his wife, whom you work with and teach his daughter reading… notices you.”

I talked myself out of it, moved on. Then yesterday I ran into his wife in the hall and the first thing out of her mouth was, “my husband really likes you!” She was going to move on with that statement, but fortunately I had something else to talk with her about, so I quickly changed the subject.

But, weird..... so weird! This is a family that the whole team I work with at school walks on eggshells about, a family we have to ask guidance from our administrators about. A family that we all know is, sorry about the harsh words, delusional about this child’s skills and abilities.

And I knew something was up with that man. But my feeling was kind of dangerous creepy. Stay away and get pulled in at the same time. And his wife tells me he likes me. Ugh. Egads.

One good thing is that I can use this to build a good professional relationship with them and hopefully try to diffuse future tensions. Perhaps be someone they can trust, because trust seems to be a big issue. They think it’s them against us, when really it’s a team working together for the best interest of their child.

End transmission. I am heading to the gym!