Want-another-baby Blues in Musings

Up until just this month the desires to have anyother baby laid dormant. Despite knowing I wanted another eventually I didn’t actively desire one.

But it hit me. The inevitable, hormonal, primal feeling in my gut “I want a baby. And quick!”

Nathan is less “demanding” about it. He wants another kid but he could wait. And by all accounts we SHOULD wait. Til he has a better job. Til we have more in savings. Til we live in a more accommodating home for another child.

But I can’t help these desires. I am 2 years and 5 months older than my brother and I loved our age difference. We played together all the time growing up. All my childhood memories involve him and I love that. I want that for Leah. And we are running out of time to have one before she’s 3.

Needless to say we didn’t necessarily try this month but we didn’t prevent either. I thought there for a bit I could have a chance to be pregnant this very cycle.

But it looks like my period is starting today. I am understandably disappointed. I used said disappointment to get out of cooking dinner and have my hubs bring us home food from our favorite local place. I’m currently counting down the minutes til he gets home.

Leah is learning and growing and getting sweeter (and sassiest) all the time. My shop is doing great. Nathan and I are doing better than ever. I am happy with life. I don’t NEED another baby.

But I still want one ;)