Time and Thoughts (Important.) in Entries of Great Significance

Time and Thoughts

I wrote this entry long ago.

I do not wish to revisit my words, because honestly, I rarely care for them.

However, this probably needs to be said with space and distance having separated this version of who I am from the man who penned those thoughts so many years ago.

Those points I made ended up being, for me, a defining part of who I am, how I lived my life, and what I felt was important in this world.

So you care for someone, right?

It matters not be they family, friend, or perhaps lover – the simple strand binding each and every one of those individuals into the complex pattern that comprises your web of affection is just as important.

Just as defining.

So, tell me, how does one show that they care?

I grew up without much means, and so rarely could I ever offer anyone I cared about something real and tangible.

That, for a young kid growing up, I thought and likely was taught through every media there was at the time that the way you care is materials.

Buy her flowers.

Take her to a nice dinner

Get your family nice Christmas gifts.

Gift to your closest friends something they wanted on their birthdays or a special moment.

For illustrative purposes, let’s examine the ‘holiday’ of Valentine’s Day, right?

What guy gets away with not getting his girl something..?

(For you fellas out there, we all know it’s actually somethings. Shhh.)

That was meant to be funny. Don’t leave me mean comments. If you do, I’ll chuckle. Lighten up, everyone. ;)

Seriously, though, isn’t it true? Evaluate your life for a moment?

I’m as guilty of it as anyone. Truly.

Convict me already. I’ve perpetrated the crime. We all have, have we not?

Still, it doesn’t matter the flowers nor the bracelets nor the jewelry..

It doesn’t matter if it’s a vacation or buying your buddies drinks or hosting a party..

These are all very valuable and tangible signs and displays of affections, but they are not concrete. They are not absolute. In fact, at times, they can be entirely deceptive and can foster and encourage feelings that should not otherwise exist.

And that, my friends, has always stuck with me.

Those of you who have known me any length of time know this – I can write. Pen pretty words on a page and offer it to you.

And I will never feel it’s good enough.

Because words are free.

They are easy.

Actions, while speaking louder, do not actually cultivate the same. Because so often we are more manipulated by the actions than the words. Because actions means something, right? It takes effort to actually do something for another. Right?

Yes, it does.

Does not mean, however, that those actions are not rooted in something far less ideal than we might want to believe and likely will not recognize.

And that’s where the burn comes in.

How we become burned by someone else.

Spurned by being used, manipulated, taken advantage of.. and often the follow through on those words and those actions once they get us to truly care is lacking.

And, in this life, isn’t that often how many relationships wander?

They become lacking.

I have always said something else about life..

When you find someone who is truly genuine, who deeply cares, and will be there for you because they care as much about you as they do themselves, well, you grab onto that person. You hold on tight. Don’t let them go.

Because they are worth beyond any weight of every measurable valuable.

They are without a numbered worth.

They are priceless.

And they are also precious and few and not common.

I myself don’t have very many people like that in my life, and yet compared to most I have an abundance of these people.

Why?

Because I believe people believe in sincerity, they sense it, when someone truly cares and they want to know you, well, you want to believe.

And I’m blessed that so many wonderful people I have met over the years have found me worthy of keeping for themselves as I treasure their company in my life.

I am blessed.

And here is the crux of my beliefs – it is not what you can give in materials or in words, but rather time and thoughts.

Those are the true greatest gifts one person can ever give another regardless of relationship.

Time and Thoughts.

We all pass from this world into the ether of the next or the void of nothingness and here is the thing, we cannot take our awards with us, we cannot take our homes and our cars and our bank accounts.

So what really is the measure of a man or woman?

Is it the statues or names on buildings or companies that you maybe created that will be your legacy?

Or rather is it the decency of your character, the quality of your caring, and the instrument with which you wield both?

I say the latter over the former.

Every single time.

So we all have a finite existence in this world as we see, know, and understand it, yes?

What can you truly do to show someone else how much they mean to you?

If I spend all day thinking about you, and you stop and truly consider that, I can never get that day back.

I gave that to you.

It is yours.

For always.

Forever.

If I spend all night consoling you or simply choosing to have a good time with you or include you in the monotony of my daily life, is that not also finite?

Have I not then chosen to give you the most precious thing that we all have to give which is our time?

I cannot give you anything more precious to me than my thoughts which equate to my time, and should you ever earn each, well, then you have stained my heart.

You have carved your name into my very soul.

Because you will be there for always and forever.

There is nothing more that you can offer someone than a smile.

A kind word.

Because that’s a thought and it is your time.

Give them more, and well, I hope we all remember this – you’ve given them everything.

You just gave them your world.

Always,
Brian Milici

May you always find your smile.

Last updated October 17, 2015