Thoughts On...The Two S's in Thoughts On...

I watch soap operas. Nothing I hide, I just watch them. I know they are fictional dramas and very few story lines would ever really happen (Satanic Possession, Rising from the Dead, Marrying Your Brother, well that could happen I guess). I am not stupid. But I do wonder…

…why don’t more characters attempt suicide? I am dead serious. Take Abigail on Days of Our Lives. First her father dies saving her (isn’t that how it happened?), then she has sex with EJ who is engaged to Sammi, has a pregnancy scare, then is publicly humiliated for the sex. Now she is with Ben, but porking Chad on the side and is pregnant but doesn’t know who the baby daddy is. That has all the makings for a bottle of tylenol and some scotch.

What about Kiki over on General Hospital. She is with Morgan, then falls in love with his brother. Hastily marries Morgan, screws around with his brother, then Morgan hooks up with her mom. Gets a divorce, is happily with Michael. Finds out that her dad is not her dad, this other guy is. Then her mom ends up pregnant with either Morgan’s baby or his dad’s baby. As if that isn’t enough, finds out that her boyfriend’s dad killed his bio dad and keeps the secret. Then finds out that her mom is probably going to be killed after she delivers her baby because she killed a mobster’s girlfriend. Her mom forced into early delivery by the crazy wife of the man she had an affair with years before, the baby is kidnapped. Then they find the baby, her mom goes to prison, she loses custody of the baby to it’s father, who has received a full pardon for murder. Falls back in love with Morgan, who then starts porking her now presumed dead mom’s twin sister, who is actually her mom. Now she finds her real dad dead on the apartment floor and thinks that the man who was once thought to be her father killed her real daddy. And she doesn’t even know her boyfriend is cheating on her. If this isn’t ripe for a suicide/attempt arc I don’t know what is.

…also why don’t more characters have STDs?

Take Sonny on General Hospital. He has been dipping his stick all over town and isn’t on any antibiotics. Yet Robin had sex with Stone once and got the HIV.

All of the young crowd are just doing each other all over the place and nobody has a burning sensation they can’t get rid of or a case of the itches? There isn’t a sudden influx of crabs in these water port towns?

What are your thoughts?