um. disappointments. in The Wonderland Years: 2015. Done.

‘well i’m disappointed. in. well my mom. and my sister.

ok so my sister i have been getting together every wk. except for um this wk. on tues. night she told me she was cancelling bc she had work on wed. which she usually does but it’s usually later so i don’t completely understand...........

so yeah. and it’s not a big thing but it doesn’t help everything else.

and in my mom. i thought my mom would always defend me. not my behaviour but me. so i thought that bc she knows that i don’t think the fact that i feel amber and them are threatening me ..............and that i think it’s not healthy. i thought my mom would defend that. well when i first went into services i do remember her telling me she wouldn’t be involved. but i didn’t think she meant emotionally. i knew she meant regarding the things i am/i’m not doing.
i guess she’s not always going to defend me. wow. this wouldn’t be such a big thing if it wasn’t my mom. ya know? and to me if someone doesn’t care enough to take action then that’s.........that’s not enough. i guess i’m not one to talk though since i don’t care that much. so i get it.
it hurts when you realise people aren’t your superpeople anymore. and up untill now and probably some times before i thought my mom was.
the reality of it is that my mom’s not going to be involved. i can be emotional about it or not but that’s the reality.’