And So It Begins... in meh...

::deep sigh::

7:34 text message: “Mama i wont be able to pay my first month rent. This job not paying me enough…“

She just fuckin moved in. First month was free.

I asked her, ASKED HER if the price for the rent was doable for her. She had mentioned that her then boss may be getting fired under janky circumstances. I told her right then and there that since she had some experience under her belt in hotel/hospitality that she should start looking for a job just in case things become a problem. “I know…” She’s always saying “I know…” when I say mention things to her, but she never, NEVER does anything until it’s too late. I tell her all the time that she needs to be active in her life and not RE-active. Some things, some foreseeable things need preventative measures taken instead of evasive.

So I’ve been shooting her emails all morning of job leads. If she stop buying cigarettes & weed maybe her money will grow. Then again, her lazy ass is probably eating out all the time. I don’t know if she has stuff to cook with so I will take that back for now (but I know my child…).

And then Mr. Him. ::smh::

I open my Facebook when I got to work this morning to find him in my message box. I started not to even look at it. But we exchanged a few words. He must have stopped following me on Instagram or else he would have seen what posted. Then it turned into some inuenndo filled one-liners. I had to excuse myself from the conversation. I’m behaving, why can’t he stay away? It’s always like that. They don’t want to be with me, but they don’t want to let me go. I can’t be his friend right now because I still love him. I always will, but I want it to go away a little so that if we are friends in the long run, many years down the line, I won’t feel weird inside. That weird, crippling burn that comes from being nervouse because you don’t know what’s about to happen.

Ugh…enough about Him…
Enough about her…

This pepsi has my heart racing.
Or maybe I’m nervous about something…

Kindest regards for a wonderful day,
Sister