common knowledge in poetry

It’s common knowledge but
If the shoe fits, that doesn’t mean you should wear it.
It might be ugly or stank as hell or
you know, it might be boot weather.
It might be a fly Air Jordan that’ll get you mugged.
The leather’s probably endangered condor hide.
The shoe fitting is not the only parameter
for whether the shoe belongs on your foot or not.

It’s common knowledge but
A penny saved is a penny stolen from you by the bank.
They’ll charge you to five bucks to take that penny out of the ATM.
They’ll embezzle it to buy a third yacht.
They’re trying to ban the penny anyway, it’s a waste of resources.
The only reason we still have pennies at all is Big Zinc.
I am goddamned serious, there are lobbyists for zinc companies
and they make up reasons why pennies still make sense.
A penny saved is a dollar in the pocket of zinc lobbyists.
Fuck zinc lobbyists. Fuck ‘em all.

It’s common knowledge but
A bird in the hand isn’t necessarily worth two in the bush,
how can you possibly know that?
How much does each weigh?
What if you’ve got a goddamned hummingbird in your hand
but there’s two heavily-concussed ostriches in the bush?
That’s good meat, right there.
What if the birds in the bush are made of gold
what if the birds in the bush grant wishes
what if the bird in your hand suffers incontinence
and sure you’ve got the bird in your hand
but it’s just pooping all the damned time?
All kinds of birds have all kinds of values!

It’s common knowledge but
Don’t look a gift horse in the mouth?
But what if there’s a tinier gift inside!
What if this horse is the turducken of gifts
and there’s maybe a diamond ring inside his mouth?
And what if it’s a trojan horse
and the only way to tell if there’s soldiers inside
is to look deep down inside the mouth?
You can’t look in the horse’s butt!
That’s just too small!
You have to look in the mouth.

But whatever you have,
whatever you do,
wherever you go,
if it’s not one thing, it’s the other
unless it’s actually a third thing!
Or a fourth thing!
Or something neither of us have ever thought of.
We are not living in a binary world
everything that is possible is possible
and that’s way the hell more than two things
so maybe common knowledge just sucks
and we should actually learn instead?