I don't want to be here... in Public

  • Nov. 20, 2013, 4:21 p.m.
  • |
  • Public

Don't consider me ungrateful, but I'm in mourning. I'm grieving the loss of an old friend. One who has been there with me for 13 years. Longer than my kids have been alive. Almost as long as my marriage lasted. Certainly longer than any work position I've had. A friend who has witnessed every major event in my life, including some I'd prefer to forget. A friend who has listened patiently to every rant and snark. A friend who never complained when I disappeared for months at a time. A friend who's also a therapist able to give me blunt feedback when I needed it. A chronicler who reads back the record whenever I'm tempted to forget.

I am grateful to Simple Mind for doing this. I'm half regretting not doing it myself. I wish him well.

But I'm not sure this is where I belong. Refugees are filtering in daily. I suppose a few old friends will pop up and setup their new virtual homesteads. I may even be one of them.

But I'm not happy about it. I'm in mourning.


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