endless night in 2015

The research clinic, bless their lovely hearts, sent me my lab results! I have the most nerdy joy in looking at lab reports. (I minored in pre-med for the lols, remember? BIOLOGY LOVE.) There were a few things of note:

-Sugar was low, but much more stable than it was several years ago, so I’ve done a great job managing that.
-Sodium was one unit higher than the lowest acceptable measurement. It is absolutely not sodium jacking up my blood pressure.
-I’m not anemic! By two units, but I’m not! But my low red blood cell/hemocrit/hemoglobin/etc levels are also, I learned, why my bruises barely show up. You can’t have bilirubin (which was also on the very low side of normal) without RBCs.
-No lingering infections of any sort. White blood cells/associated immunology cells literally just chillin’ and not elevated in any way, shape, or form.
-I do need to fix my cholesterol ratios. They were a bit skewed, although not clinically significant. I’d eaten like crap for two days before the test, so again, it was either that or just my lousy genetics. They could be better.
-Calcium was nice and moderate! Take that, lactose intolerance.
-Protein was on the high-moderate side of normal. Thanks, exercise!
-Liver and kidneys both functioning beautifully, inasmuch as the blood counts can tell. Suck it, binge drinking and kidney stones.

There are a lot ways that the odds are stacked against my adult/geriatric health; my mom’s family has lousy teeth; they both have lousy blood sugar, cholesterol, blood pressure, sodium, all those things; both sides have kidney stones; dad’s dad had heart disease; mom and her mom are plagued with neurological… maladies of various sorts. I’ve been aware of these things since I was a teenager and despite stories of the terrible things I’ve done to/with pizza rolls and that time I lived for a week off cheesecake and Pepsi, I’ve always felt strongly about defeating that genetic legacy.

So, to be 28 and still have those particular red flags completely buried in the metaphorical sand, is something of a very real triumph. I was 18 when I actively decided to be careful with salt intake, and… 23? ish? when I decided that I was going to invest in a healthy lifestyle before my metabolism shifted down, and several years later, it’s absolutely paying off. I have so many friends who are my age and grossly overweight, or struggling with health issues. I very, very much do not take this triumph for granted.

So now to just… wait and see on the blood pressure. I had two caffeinated beverages and Sudafed today to deal with my all-day headache and certainly the effect of the uppers. Aaron even noticed my heart racing a bit. I’ve never had a perfectly normal EKG, although not ever clinically significant. The rest of the birth control side effects are dying (Aaron is so excited), so DIE WITH THEM, HIGH BLOOD PRESSURE. GO AWAY.

I would like a nutritionist’s advice on how to moderate the cholesterol ratios while still maintaining everything else and taking in enough energy to work out 3-4 times a week. Without my carbs and olive oil, I am a miserable, exhausted, cranky person.

Rockfest was all I needed it to be, and more. We left at noon and came back at 10, and my sunburn is tanning very quickly. I think my skin exploded in real sunshine. Also, it was just the hottest day of the year, with no clouds, and everybody roasted. My feet were swollen and killing me and I was beyond filthy, and it was wonderful, honestly.

Highlights:
-Aaron and Micah got carried away by crowdsurfing tides, leaving me unsupervised with just Krystel, who is only a passive observer. Someone dropped a turkey leg in the dust. Everyone pointed and wailed its loss. I convinced the big dude with a beer next to us to rinse it off with his beer. Then I flailed at him until he looked at me funny and lowered it to my level, whereupon I took a giant bite of dusty, beer-flavored turkey leg and immediately had like 6 wildly cheering fans. YOU CAN’T WASTE A TURKEY LEG. He flung the turkey leg across the crowd, beamed at me, and then basically picked me up and sent me rolling over the crowd’s heads.

-I kept a perfect rigid plank the entire time and never came close to falling. I am particularly proud of the point before being tipped over the side into the security guards’ waiting arms, I only had two points of contact holding me up: one on my thigh and one on my ribs. I was on my side. I held myself up without even an arm to balance. FUCK YES THANK YOU BURPEES. When I got pushed over the side, I dropped into a nice balanced V like a cheerleader and the guard caught me easily. It was textbook. Hell yes. When I pranced back to my previous position, my newfound fans delightedly proclaimed me a badass. Yes. Yes I am.

-Micah saw me crowdsurfing first. “That’s your wife!” Then Aaron looked. “That’s MY WIFE!” They even had a fistbump. Awwwww.

-Some girl might have copped a feel on my partially exposed boob (yay cleavage) and then found me again later. She was very sexually aggressive. And hot. Aaron is so pissed that he missed it TWICE.

-Aimee and I could not stay away from the mosh pits and my triceps are still burning two days later from enforcing the outer wall. I’ve got bruises and only fell… once, I think, when someone barreled right into my hip joint. Other than that I held my own and Aimee held her own, and we had this glorious, transcendent, violent experience that was more cathartic than all the trail running in the world. THANK YOU NONPOINT. THANK YOU SEETHER.

-I punched a guy to make him pay attention to the crowdsurfer about to nail him in the head. He gave me super-crush-admiration eyes the rest of the set. So did his buddies. They called me hardcore. I fled to find my husband (who was waiting in the food line for a drink refill) before I ended up with a harem. (Back in the day… oh, the fun I would have had with that.)

-When I found him in line, I was covered in moshpit dust and various flying drinks and giddy and full of well-earned swagger and he got the biggest grin on his face. “I’m so madly in love with you right now.” “Can I have some of your ice? My mouth is full of dust.”

-Aimee met one of the local bands somehow and acquired backstage access. FREE POWERADE. BETTER. THAN. GOLD. We drank multiple Powerades, multiple 32oz Cokes, and neither of us peed all day. We were still pretty dehydrated.

-Chris had a harem! A legitimate one! With like 2-3 girls! All fucking day! …and then they “went to the bathroom” and abandoned him right before the headliner. RIP, Chris’s harem. He’s not quite over it.

-Someone had a selfie stick. I threw trash from the ground at it. Like a dozen other people joined in. The selfie stick came down. HAHAHA. But no, seriously, it was just going to get broken anyway and WHO THE FUCK BRINGS A SELFIE STICK TO A METAL FESTIVAL.

-We ended up taking a shower together because we were too damn tired and sore to take turns. It was not sexy. It was brutally efficient. And then we passed out and it was glorious. New post-concert tradition! Just like apple juice. And Waffle House when out of town.

-Food vendor had fried alligator on a stick. OH. HELL. YES. I spent the entirety of Hellyeah’s set in line and it was worth every damn bite. (Also, their sound was hideous and no one in line minded being in line, away from the speakers. Ouch.)

And then Monday night/Tuesday hit. Aaron didn’t get the loan. And without the loan, he can’t get the job that they’re inclined to offer him.

Back to waiting for a miracle.

Last updated April 29, 2015