little children in Book of Lies.....

The child had flashes of memories of who father was but mostly those were traumatic events. .There were little memories of any good days. Maybe there weren’t any to remember. One was falling in the toilet when just a tot and father having come to the rescue. In the end memories of the father were just stories told by mother of what happened and why father was never around. The last memory was of the big man in blue with the shiny badge. He seemed nice.
Big brother was always in memories as a sense of family with a dose of fear added. Brother started the apartment on fire playing with matches but only the waste can burned. They were okay. Father being gone faded fast. It was just mom and the two of them and some of her friends popping in and out. They all seemed nice. Then things became not so nice.
The child recalls they could no longer live with mother. Suddenly they were in a different town with someone else’s family. It seemed the family was not very happy with the two of them being there. They tried to be good but three and four year olds sometimes could not be good enough. Neighbors accused them of stealing because they were strangers. The little children didn’t steal anything. The little children who steal in this family get hit with a belt and a stick. When the other children in the home cried the little children were also strapped. The child came to believe little children with bad parents must be bad too.
There was no one to tell and no one to trust as they were believed to be liars. Telling on grown ups may mean never being able to go home to mother. There would be no telling. Even little children could learn the truth was not always the smart thing to say. Better to say nothing. Lonely lost children just wait and hope. There wasn’t much crying either. You cried when it was expected.
The little children got to go home to visit mother once and awhile. Going back was very hard. Mother said there was no money. She promised the little children would be able to come home soon. Father had left with everything and left nothing for mother. No one knew where father was. Father was gone for good. They were gone so they could eat. The little children didn’t care much about eating. They wanted their mother.
Soon another man was around when the little children came home to visit. Mom wanted him to be called uncle. The little children had uncles. He was not one of their uncles. This uncle was different. There was something wrong about this uncle. He could come for lunch and eat mother’s food. The children believed he was not to be trusted. Sadly, the children were right.
Mother had them come home one weekend and she was very excited. Mother had a new home. It was out in the country surrounded by a forest. The little children were very excited too. The new uncle was there too. The little children were told the new uncle would be living in the house too. Mother told the little children the uncle was going to become their new dad. One weekend the little children came home and mother promised they would never to back to the other family. Even then the little children did not tell about the beatings. They had a home. This was a day when the children did cry.
The uncle demanded the little children called him dad. He would get mad if the children did not. He wasn’t dad but the little children knew grownups hit children that made them mad. Dad is was. He seemed nice enough but eventually little children get into trouble and certain troubles carried certain punishments. There was a big pilgrim belt that hung in the basement. It had a big shiny square buckle. It was very wide. It was not for wearing but to keep little children mindful to be well behaved. Confused little children sometimes forget to behave and the belt would be taken off of it’s hanger. Little children then had to bear their bottoms and take the leather to skin to better remember to behave. Grownups don’t always understand little children do learn from leather. Sometimes they learn the wrong things. Sometimes they learn to be angry and to lie. Sometimes little children learn all of the wrong ways to be smart little children.

Last updated April 16, 2015