The following piss me off:
When the train is close to pulling in the station and people prematurely get up and start towards the door, usually making me move/let go of the poles or whatever so I almost fall over just because your stupid ass has to be the first one out. YOU WILL HAVE ENOUGH TIME WHEN THE TRAIN STOPS and don't get all pissy at me because I am 'in your way' when I am just standing where I am supposed to because there is NO OTHER ROOM.
People who really just don't listen because when it is your turn to talk they are too busy thinking of the next stupid thing they are going to say.
People who can't discriminate good stories worth telling, from stories about mundane aspects of life. I have this really loud friend who will be like "SO I HAVE A STORY" then go on to tell me about how she took a picture of her shoes when she was in Rome. So what? What the fuck? That is not a story. That is not something you say loudly. That is an off the cuff remark.
Anyone who describes themselves as a "perfectionist". This is a round about way of saying you think everything you do is perfect. When meanwhile I CAN THINK OF 57 THINGS YOU DO THAT ARE NOT PERFECT. In fact, people who proudly claim to be a perfectionist are doing it wrong, because if you really are obsessed with everything being perfect than you probably have low self esteem and should be trying to fix that. Which brings me to...
PEOPLE WHO "CUTELY" DIAGNOSE THEMSELVES WITH OCD BECAUSE THEY LIKE TO ORGANIZE THEIR SOCKS BY COLOR OR CARRY HAND SANITIZER AROUND OR SOME SHIT LIKE THAT. YOU DO NOT HAVE OCD. IF YOU REALLY DID HAVE OCD, YOU WOULD NOT BE ANNOUNCING IT TO EVERYONE AS IF IT WERE AN ADORABLE QUIRK. IT IS NOT FUN TO HAVE TO GO TO THERAPY 4 DAYS A WEEK BECAUSE YOU CAN NOT GET RECURRING NEGATIVE THOUGHTS OUT OF YOUR HEAD. Also, not all people with OCD are clean and organized. IF that's all it was than it wouldn't be a disorder. It's good to be clean and organized. It is not good to live your life in fear and paranoia.
Insecure people who feel the need to reaffirm themselves constantly. I have another friend who is 26 and has never been in a relationship. She is an attractive and smart girl (in fact she is a fucking lingerie model) and nobody is judging her, but yet she feels the need to constantly talk about how shallow she is and the reason why she is single is by her choice because no man is good enough for her or attractive enough for her. If you say it once, ok I get it, you're picky about men. But if every conversation we have turns into this, it means you are actually incredibly insecure and deep down you feel like everyone wonders why you're still single. Honestly, nobody cares.
People who LIE. This falls under the insecurity bubble too. I'm not talking about white lies or even lies that have a point (Like saying you can't go somewhere because you are sick/have a family thing etc.) I'm talking about just lies you make up to make yourself sound better. This same friend from the above rant, will always tell me stories that go like this:
Her: "So this guy came up to me in Canal St. station yesterday. A bald man with a My Little Pony tattoo on his neck"
Ok that part I believe. Nothing out of the ordinary there.
Her: "He looks at me and says 'Hey sexy, wanna come home with me?"
Once again, this happens all the time. And yes it is per usual for me to respond aggressively by giving the finger or saying fuck off or rolling my eyes and walking away, but here is what my friend claims to have said back to this guy:
Her: "You know, I feel really sorry for you that you somehow think a guy like you can get me. I mean really, if my mother saw you, she would burst out laughing. Maybe you shouldn't be in New York. There is this place called Los Angeles, California where I hear they have good plastic surgeons, but I doubt that even they could make you decent looking"
And she tells this story and everyone laughs and says "You are so good at comebacks!"
Ok I'm sorry but no one is that witty. To just say that back to a guy who says "Hey Sexy?" My whole thing is, I'll believe it when I see it. And I have not yet, in the time I have known this girl, ever actually heard her say anything like that to anyone. When I am with her and we get hit on by ugly guys, she usually ignores them. How come these things never happen when someone else is around?
I hate people.
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