What Writers Need To Prove in Personal Essays

Day 82:
Good Afternoon, Friends:
I want to talk about the writer today…the visionary.
Finally, I understand a puzzle piece of myself that I have never understood of myself, and I have to stand corrected on it.
I realized that I choice to use writing to excuse the “visions” I have. The daydreams of how I can take experiences and choices and wrapped them into fiction.
The power of realizing this has even further made me a better writer for I understand why I have the compulsion to write.
I’ve been researching Truman Capote and Harper Lee…and why both of these best friends chose different paths. I believe I know why.
The writer can’t have everything. The creator can have everything. However, we like to box writers/visionaries/artists/creators/scientists/explorers into a neat tidy box. We have to remember that ultimately, that there are INDIVIDUALS behind these positions. You aren’t only just a writer. Or an artist. Or a visionary. Or a creator. Or a scientist. Or an explorer. You are a person first, and all of us have certain talent(s), but it doesn’t mean that we are only the talent. We are people.
You put folks in a pedestal, and no wonder they fall because they could never meet up to your expectations to begin with.
What I am saying is get to know the person not what everyone else, including you, thinks of them.
• Cheers,
S –From SMF on Facebook

“Lee has succeeded in protecting herself over the last half-century, and living a life which is of her choosing. In a rare statement recently, a letter to Oprah Winfrey’s magazine, she suggested how out-of-touch with modern life she has become: “In an abundant society where people have laptops, cellphones, iPods and minds like empty rooms, I still plod along with books.” That detachment is, clearly, necessary to her. It is the paradox of the novel that it could not have been written by someone in love with literary fame; that the fame it achieved and deserved killed off any prospect of a succeeding masterpiece” (http://www.telegraph.co.uk/culture/books/8485628/Why-Harper-Lee-remained-silent-for-so-many-years.html).

“Writing has laws of perspective, of light and shade, just as painting does, or music. If you are born knowing them, fine. If not, learn them. Then rearrange the rules to suit yourself.
• From a 1957 interview” (http://en.wikiquote.org/wiki/Truman_Capote)

“To me, the greatest pleasure of writing is not what it’s about, but the music the words make.” (http://www.notable-quotes.com/c/capote_truman.html).

From what I know about Truman Capote…

He was eccentric. He was a celebrity. He was quirky. Most of all…

He was the best writer of his generation in the 20th century.

I like Truman Capote a lot even though I have never met him. That’s because I’ve hung with people that have a similar personality like him. He was a total diva but was able to back it up with his talent. His craftsmanship and passion as a writer was amazing. He knew earlier on that he wanted to a writer…and as he grew older, he knew that in order to be the best, he would need to take writing as seriously as a child like parents drilled into their children in how important it was to train to become a lawyer or a doctor: ” Of his early days Capote related, “I began writing really sort of seriously when I was about eleven. I say seriously in the sense that like other kids go home and practice the violin or the piano or whatever, I used to go home from school every day and I would write for about three hours. I was obsessed by it.” (http://www.pbs.org/wnet/americanmasters/episodes/truman-capote/introduction/58/).

I remember reading that in a psychobiography that I haven’t finished yet.

I know what Capote is talking about with being an obsessive writer. I started to taking my writing seriously around middle school age. However, his seriousness was much more…intense than mines. That’s the only difference. I don’t think I fully understood that I needed to work at my writing like someone playing the tuba or piano, but I wished I did.

But I will say that I have a lot of writing to prove. I’ve always been a prolific writer. One who writes a lot than the average person, I believe. I remember Stephen King saying that if you want to become a remotely good writer, you need to at least writer four hours a day. I also read somewhere Malcolm Gladwell indicated that if you want to be good at anything, you need to put in 10,000 hours (10 years) of it…

I think I have put over a little over 10 years.

I still have a long way to go.

However, because Capote took his talent/craft seriously, he is one of the greatest American novelist in our time. His work is astounding, and I haven’t read it yet, In Cold Blood for what others have critique over several decades is a masterpiece.

Whereas, his best friend, Harper Lee wrote one novel…and as everyone calls it, a one hit wonder. I have never read To Kill a Mockingbird, either (I should be ashamed of myself).

Anyway, these best friends were two very different individuals. Capote thrived off his celebrity status while Lee became more exclusive in her living and daily activities. She doesn’t give interviews (except one I know). She decided not pursue writing in a way Capote did not. Maybe…I speculate…how Capote did with his fame might have turned Lee off of wanting to relish in hers?

Nevertheless, these two writers, so far, have taught me a lot about what a writer needs to prove to oneself.

For one, I need to prove that I am good. Not great. Not decent. Good. Maybe if I can prove to myself that I am good, then, I can work on making my work great.

Sometimes, people tend to forget that writers create great works, but it doesn’t mean the person is great himself/herself. Ernest Hemingway and F. Scott Fitzgerald were great writers, but they made mistakes and had many trials throughout their lives. Hemingway killed himself like his father before, and Fitzgerald died of a heart attack in his forties.

Usually, you become a writer because you either come from a dysfunctional environment, have had many challenges, or have profound experiences. That’s how most writers become writers. I am a writer because writing is the tool I use to express myself. It is a tool that I understand well to express myself. I like drawing, but I am not as talented as I am concerning writing. It is more challenging for me draw figures/objects and translate them into expressions of experiences of how I feel. Writing is easier to me. I rather write and picture how I see those experiences and how they make me feel.

Another item in proving as a writer is honesty. To be a writer, you have to be honest with yourself even if you can’t with no one else. Usually, when you are honest with yourself, you are honest with other people, too. It is hard to admit you are a flaw individual…and that sometimes, you act like a coward. I know I have. It is difficult to admit that than admitting anything else.

Another matters about proving that you are a writer is that…compassion, empathy, and sympathy is a most. What makes a great writer is someone who understands a heroes’ and villains’ thousand faces. I mean a lot of faces. To become a great writer, you must understand others’ beyond yourself. If you cannot, then, you are limited in expressing experiences and situations. To understand others means you understand a great deal about yourself as well.

An additional matter in going about proving that you are a writer is that you are an open-minded person. This sort of correlates with having emotional intelligence just as I describes. If you are close minded, the exchange of ideas and understanding is minimal. To be open minded means that you aren’t afraid of feeling inadequate about yourself. That you aren’t afraid to feel inadequate or stupid. Being open minded means that you are willing to become vulnerable to gain the possibility of great understanding.

And lastly, what we need to prove as writers that we understand the levels of dimensions of individuals…even ourselves.

I find that for me, characterization, is important. Developing characters are important. Understanding how to develop characters is important and that goes back to having emotional intelligence and having an open mind.

Everyone is not going to like us. We all are acquired tastes. Don’t expect someone to love shrimp like you do. Some folks hate shrimp but like oysters. Some folks are omnivores while others are vegans.

Does that mean we should diss people for having different dietary restrictions?

I will say it is okay for you to say you don’t know how someone can just strictly eat veggies because it is not getting enough protein. That’s being inquisitive just as it is okay for a vegan to say that they can’t see how someone can just eat animals when they are living creatures. It is very unnerving especially when people own animals as pets.

However, respect is key. Some people aren’t bothered by eating meat and owning pets because they compartmentalize it. That’s okay because in their heads, they can keep it to where they aren’t vomiting every for seconds thinking about it. Just like vegans will find ways to try to make sure they are healthier because they aren’t getting that superior protein fix.
Yet, respect comes in when you understand that a person makes a choice based on their lifestyle. A person’s character should not be judged on what kind of diet he/she chooses. It should be based on other characteristics as well. This means you are required to get to know a person for a little just before you make a judgement. Some of us can spot a person that smells like rotten banana a mild a way because we have had experiences of smelling rotten bananas. However, make sure that you are careful with that and you have enough experience to do that.
• I would say crafting characters is the same way. In order for you to craft characters, you have to know a lot about characters—alive, dead, fictional, and non-fictional. The point of knowing characters is so you have a good grip of what it takes to create characters in your novels…

Situations come next. Make sure that you involve yourself in many situations as an observer, experiencer, and a reader. A lot of what I know is a mixture of both, and I still feel like I am not ready to write a novel even though I know I am ready. And that’s it…when you don’t feel ready, I think you are ready.

What I am saying is that we, creators/visionaries, what we have to prove is that we have what it takes…that we have the guts to take that leap of faith as Capote describes:

“All writing, all art, is an act of faith. If one tries to contribute to human understanding, how can that be called decadent? It’s like saying a declaration of love is an act of decadence. Any work of art, provide it springs from a sincere motivation to further understanding between people, is an act of faith and therefore is an act of love.
• From a 1952 interview” (http://en.wikiquote.org/wiki/Truman_Capote)
I don’t know why this surprise that Capote said it, but it does. I think the reason why it surprises me because of how Capote is painted in the media predominantly…and me not know everything about him.

Yet, I want to say that there is more to this man than meets the eye. With what he said, I believe he believed that. Now, I am starting to realize that it is an act of faith. As a writer, I’ve always been afraid. Afraid of rejection because in my own life I’ve been rejected by many people who I cared about…who I put faith in.
But when it comes to my own self, I have so many self-doubts. I believe that I self-sabotage myself when it comes to my writing. I am afraid that no one will like it.

However, I believe this means that I am not writing for the right reasons. For me, to be true to myself, I need to write for myself…and not care if anyone else likes it but me. When I finish it, I should judge it by the standards of all what I know about writing.

Writing comes from a deep well of imagination, passion, love, and faith. That faith comes from flying and knowing that you will land safely and soundly in what you need to. Faith is giving trust that you know you can do it. Failure is not bad. Failure means you on to something…the continuing answers you need to grow.

Cheers,
S