Work Assessment and Hen Parties in Diary

Yesterday I had my two week assessment at work. It was like a mini test which I wasn’t expecting. My line manager asked me about the different processes and fired questions at me about what I would do in different situations. I answered most of them correctly and he said he’s more than happy with my work, I’ve picked it up really quickly and he’s confident that he can leave me to get on with things without having to check up on me.

So I was surprised when he told me that he’d said to our Senior Buyer that he thought he had made a mistake in hiring me. Ouch. He did say he’s always blunt and honest, but hearing that wasn’t very easy. He said I’m too quiet and he was worried that I’m not integrating myself into the group.

Our Senior Buyer stuck up for me and told him that he can’t expect me to be life and soul of the party right away; I’m trying to learn 5 million new things (her words!) and try to fit into a well established, confident and loud group at the same time. She said that anyone would be overwhelmed to start with.

And that’s exactly it. I did tell him in my interview that I’m always quiet to start with and it takes me a while to gain confidence with new people. I said I always spend some time listening to people and getting to know them that way, then I know what I can talk to them about, how to talk to them etc.

He admitted he made a mistake saying that and he’s looking forward to hearing me coming out of my shell. One task he gave me was joining in the tea and coffee making run, even though I don’t drink it myself. Apparently that’s a good way to get to know people…really?

I wish there was a box you could tick when you start a new job saying whether you’re shy or not, an introvert or extravert. It would surely help people to know what to expect from you!

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In other news, I’ve been invited to a friend’s hen party at the end of May. I love a good hen party and jumped at the chance. A tour of the Harry Potter studios, followed by playing hen party games, picnic in the park and a night out in London town. It sounded great, I said sign me up. I looked at the guest list and loads of my friends from Loughborough are invited so there are bound to be a few people I know going.

So the organiser booked the studio tour tickets and said we each owe her £30. Fair enough. Only now it turns out that none of my Loughborough friends are going, all of the hen’s friends from London are going so I won’t know anyone but they all know each other.

The Harry Potter tickets are booked for 9am so I would have to get a hotel on my own the night before otherwise I wouldn’t get there on time. The others live in London so it’s easy for them to get to.

I now owe her £30 for the studio tour ticket. But if I want to go, it’s going to cost me an extra £80-£100 for the train and the hotel. If I wanted to stay for the rest of the stuff, the price will sky rocket again. I don’t think I want to go now, seeing as I don’t know anyone and it’s going to cost me over £100 just to go on the studio tour.

It’s on the bank holiday weekend, and I normally go up to Cumbria to visit my family. When I thought it was going to be a weekend with my friends, I didn’t mind too much. But now it’s a weekend with a load of strangers, and possibly just one overnight on my own and one morning with a bunch of strangers…I don’t want to give up three days with my family for that, and it’s too far to travel from London to Cumbria for two nights.

So my options are.
1) Cut my losses, give her the £30 for the ticket and not go.
2) Pay an extra £80-£100 for the train and hotel, go to the studio tour and come back, giving up a weekend with my family.
3) Pay an extra God knows how much for the whole weekend and feel awkward with a bunch of strangers in a stupidly expensive city.

What would you do?