Thoughts on...piles of fetid poo or movies & tv in Thoughts On...

A few different things on my mind today, so I thought I would get some of it out there.

Fifty Shades of Grey
The more I see of Dakota Johnson & Jamie Dornan the more I can’t get behind them as Anastasia & Christian. I didn’t really have any front runners in mind when I heard they were turning this pile of shitty b reel porn into a movie. I definitely didn’t see Charlie Hunnam as Christian, I just can’t separate him from his SOA character. I was hoping with a sexier Christian. Jamie Dornan seems like a cross between a pussy & a creeper, a Crussy if you will. And what I have seen in the trailer tells me Dakota Johnson won’t be winning any legitimate awards (I am sure there will be some MTV Movie nominations for something from this fetid pile of trash). In case you are wondering, I do plan on seeing the movie because I cannot wait to see what they take out and how they turn this dung pile into a “romance”.

General Hospital
For the love of satan, can we just fucking end this Fluke storyline? Between this and PentonOz, I can’t stand to watch this show. Also, on “New Years” how many times did Maxi & Nathan do it? It was like an excerpt chapter from Fifty Shades. Also, why does he still have pain from his gunshot wound and no scar? That shit leaves scars.

The best news I have heard in a long time is that Kiki is out. Kristen Alderson is leaving GH and that, my friends, is great news. I don’t like her character, she is a weak link. Now if she could take Michael with her, that would be awesome. My beef with Mikey is that he is running, what I assume is a multi-million dollar company with zero business knowledge. The play was that he was voted the new CEO to oust Tracey. Fine, but why doesn’t he have Ned backing him up? Where did he get any business sense? His mom’s business has basically been being a whore until Jax gave her a freaking hotel, which Olivia runs most of. His “father” runs a coffee import cover for his mob business. His bio-daddy was a washed up drunk who I don’t even think attended college. Plus Mikey is a convicted felon, so did not one board member think that maybe Ned would be a better candidate? If the purpose was to take control from Tracey & Fluke, why did it have to be Michael?

Chicago Fire
What the hell are Casey & Dawson fighting about? Is it her talking to Mills? Is it because they are working together & he is overprotective & she is too headstrong and ready to prove herself? Because I can use my nephew’s reasoning in this situation:
“I can tell you who’s fault it is. Casey, it is your fault and here’s why: You told the Chief that Dawson could be on truck 51, that your relationship would not get in the way. But, you coddle Dawson, even though she wants to be treated equally. So it is your fault that she was found in the shower by Mills (fully clothed) and leaned on him, because you are a dick.”
Problem solved. Also, I find it a bit curious that Baby Boden was perfectly fine in a fire truck, but the minute a trained professional nurse took him, he turned blue and stopped breathing. Did they take this baby to Chicago Hope? And why did the doctor keep calling the machine the E-C-M-O and not ECMO like every other doctor/doctor show? It’s like they dumbed it down for the new parents and/or the audience. We are not stupid y’all.

Football
The two minute “warning”. Yesterday I watched as they let like ten seconds click off the clock as they all stood around with their dicks in their hands and then went on another commercial break/time out. What the actual hell is that all about? A week ago, the two minute “warning” came at 1:59, so if it can come under two minutes, why can it not come, just over two minutes? It seems like a dipshit thing to do when they go back and add time onto the clock whenever they feel like it. Also, what are they warning them of? It takes like 30 minutes to play that two minutes. Is there not a scoreboard with time that they can look at? Do they not have coaches & every other person on the sidelines telling them how much time? The freaking QB has a stereo system in his helmet for fuck’s sake, can he not say, “Hey guys we only have a few minutes left”? And they get like a billion time outs per quarter, so they need a break with two minutes left in a quarter? In hockey, you get one 30 second time out for the entire fucking game. That is up to 65 minutes of playing time during the regular season and if you are in the playoffs and go into overtime, you can be looking at 120+ minutes of playing time and you still get one 30 second time out. Just ONE!

With the lack of new episodes, this is what my life has been reduced to, football, General Hospital and the stupid trailer for Fifty Shades of Grey. It’s a good thing I don’t live in a city with easy bridge access.