Not sure what this ones supposed to prove.... - 21/11/2001 in Opendiary Archive

SURVEY 148: PSYCHOPATH? 11/21/2001

1. Are they watching you right now?

Dunno. Who’s they? If by they you mean the president of Swaheli, probably not. Actually, whoever you mean, probably not.

1. You’re driving on a pretty open road (that is to say, no buildings or people anywhere). There’s an attractive person of the opposite sex hitchhiking. All they have with them is a small bag or purse. What do you do?

I can’t drive, so I thank god for paradox’s and continue to drive, safe in the knowledge that the woman cannot exist.

1. Your feelings on homework?

Homework?

1. Does everyone hate you?

Not yet. Soon, but not yet.

1. If you could tell the other person living inside you to stop doing one thing, what would that be?

Thinking.

1. You did lock the front door, right?

Erm. In a library? Probably not.

1. You are parked legally, right?

Once again this comes back to my inability to drive an automobile. No, I’m not parked legally. I’m not even parked.

1. Complete this statement: Don’t do drugs, except when:

a)You want to get a good nights kip
b) You don’t want to get a good nights kip
c) You’re REALLY bored.

1. Referring to question 2 above: It did occur to you that the person had a gun in the bag and was gonna leave you on the side of the road dead in your underwear, right?

She couldn’t have, she didn’t exist. ut yes, it did occur to me.

1. What’s your greatest fear?

I have no fear.

1. If you had a dollar for every stupid or regrettable thing you’ve ever done, would you play golf with Bill Gates?

No. But I’d nick his golf club and beat him to death with them. So does that count?

1. You call someone and there’s a busy signal. Call back later, call back in 4 minutes, keep hitting redial, *67/RINGBACK IF UR UK, or will you forget to call back again when you need to?

All of the above.

1. Take all the times you’ve tried to get on TV or meet a celebrity in the past 5 years (just guess), add the number of people on your buddy list whom you’ve dumped your entire pathetic emotional state on, and multiply that by how many drinks you’ve had in the past week.

20 + 1 x 25 = 525

1. If the number from question 13 is above 150… the psychologist knows, right? Oops

2. Now, you’d never do anything insane like you see on the news… but you can RELATE sometimes, right?

nod nod nod.

1. Are you good with names?

Not really no.

1. You did lock the front door, right?

Erm. I have this sense that I’m moving backwards through time. So I’m going to have not locked my door.

1. Complete this statement: Caffeine is....

Funny in large doses?

1. Did you ever wear a ski mask for any other purposes than skiing?

I never where a ski mask WHEN I’m skiing. So yes.

1. Is it just me, or does the water taste funny?

Not when you’re from england, it’s scrummy over here.

1. Have you ever prepared food halfway and then left the house, and found it later where you left it?

Embarressed. Yeah.

1. You’ve never stayed up all night on OD?

Nope. It’s frankely not cool enough.

1. You did lock the front door, right?

AAAAAAaaaaaaaarrrrrrrggggggghhhhhhhh!

1. How do you handle giving out personal information on the Internet?

I use the name Boiling_man, what do you think