2/16/25 in The Beginning

Currently sitting here in the dark listening to Bob Dylan’s Jokerman:
Jokerman dance to the nightingale tune
Bird fly high by the light of the moon
Oh, oh, oh, Jokerman
Well, the Book of Leviticus and Deuteronomy
The law of the jungle and the sea are your only teachers
In the smoke of the twilight on a milk-white steed
Michelangelo indeed could’ve carved out your feature

Sitting here not feeling depressed, moreso apathetic. There’s times in my life where I get in this sort of mindset and it allows me to be more “confident” in myself (i.e. not caring what people think of me). It makes me gain conference in myself but is it really confidence if you’re faking it just based on changes of a temporary mindset?

I suppose due to some things going on in my personal life, I’ve been wondering about opinions. Specifically, why people care about what others think about them? There’s people in my life who care how I view them, but why? If I call you an asshole, why does my opinion on you being an ass (and let’s face it, we are all assholes to someone).

Why, as humans, do we care so much about opinions? I don’t understand it. We’re all just flesh, blood, and bones trapped on this earth for a finite time until we perish. We all go through the same emotions and experiences in life and yet we try to get acceptance from everyone. Maybe now I’m talking to myself. At the end of the day no one is God, we are all the same. Animals living amongst each other in the wild, trying to make it through day-by-day.