Stupid rant in 1st

I woke him at 5. We have spent the last hour near silence. He has this look on his face like I owe him an apology. I called him lazy and since he got up he’s busied himself with laundry and whatever.

He actually told me he couldn’t lie here (in bed) anymore. Funny because he had no intention of getting before I woke him. He went out to the living room. Scott came home and I guess Rocky looked miserable because Scott asked about it. Surprise, surpise, Rocky’s back hurts. Apparently from riding around the last couple days. Yeah, anytime we have conversations like this where all my irritation comes out he never has anything to say in response and his back always hurts.

His back hurts is why he can’t get up at 8 instead of moments before he has to leave for work. His back hurts is why he can’t talk to me now? He seems to not be able to stand being in the room with me. There is a chair in here. He stayed in it long enough to change out a CD meant to be ripped to the external hard drive .....it’s his… Thank god that is almost done. I’m doing it, he’s hardly helped and he’s going to reap the rewards. ....it’s something that he could have worked on instead of sleeping 12-30 hours. As if no one ever does anything when they are tired. That the only thing to do when tired is sleep. How about enjoying the company of loved ones? Nah that’s cool yo, no worries I can understand I’m not loved enough. Nothing new. Just have spent way too much time on this one. He’s standing here now staring at me.....holding his phone. I look up he says “yes?” Like I should say something. WTF ever. I honestly wouldn’t care if he decided he should leave for work at 7 today (usually 9) he’s sort of making me mad just being here. .....

Really do wish it wasn’t raining and/or I had a good reason to run out for something. Could really use an escape this moment. So shitting that Alicen could never call at moments like this but always a 6 waking me up on a Monday.