I hate it when we don't drink together in 1st

I was talking of wine, reading, pizza and a quiet evening on the way home but Rocky decided watching some Dr. Who was more called for than Lestat. I compromised and told him I would watch while we ate but intended on reading before I slept.

We watched 2 episodes and when we were done so was the bottle of wine but the tingle in my face and lips was in full force. I was in high spirits and perhaps my voice was a bit loud. I know I talk loud naturally and I hate it when someone points it out while I’m drunk. There was a childish yes no argument over it while I was playing stupid games in bed on my iPad. Rocky has been reading on it and I intended on giving to him when I was done. He turned off the light and I told him I would be turning it back on to read, he said nothing. When I was done with the games I said “here, so you can read” and he bumped it with his elbow as if to say he didn’t want it. I said “I thought you were gonna read too, here take it.” He yelled back at me that he was praying and to stop interrupting him. I said “yeah, that’s Christian like, just go to sleep when your done then” turned the light on and read a chapter or 2. His breathing evened out almost immediately and he went to sleep. I’m actually amazingly irritated by this.

When we first got together there was a night when his intention was to take me home and get me drunk. We had a good time. We get drunk together very seldom because of work schedules, designated driving, the thirst just not there or what have you. Last night showed promise and I was rather happy about it. Instead of sharing a bottle of wine he poured his cup into mine when I wasn’t looking and aside from the first sips I saw him take I actually consumed the bottle myself. He shushed my drunk humor toward the end of the viewing and was highly annoyed by the fact that I wanted to read and thought he did. Who’s fault is that? I had stated my intentions. I stuck to my scheduling and I got yelled at? In my drunk state I was hurt enough that I really considered leaving the ring on his bedside stand and sleeping on the couch. Today though things don’t seem as bad, I am still no happy camper. It is noon, he’s still not up. I drank he didn’t. Then again if I had yelled at him because he interrupted my prayers I would be so ashamed of myself I would want to face him either.

I want to go somewhere, just to town, out of the house. It’s raining and it makes me shy away from going out unless I have to. Horrible cold drizzly rain. I’d rather save taking leave for after he gets up so that I can avoid him a bit today. Seriously I’m a good bit sore. I don’t yell at him even when he deserves it. I don’t feel I deserved it and it was so highly inappropriate.