Note To Self: in And The Rest.

Fucking pick up the pieces of yourself, moron, and stuff them all back inside where they belong. Swallow them like broken glass and smile while you’re doing it, I’m fucking sick of your whining.

Oh, so life hasn’t turned out the way you hoped? Well excuse me while my heart just fucking bleeds for you. Who made all your fucking mistakes and your shit decisions? You did, moron, so stop playing the fucking victim and unravelling all over the place like a two-quid Primark sweater, nobody cares.

Oh, and maybe your fucking husband isn’t Mr Right? Well he’s Mr All You’re Fucking Getting, so get the fuck over it. If you didn’t think it was right you should have stuck to your fucking guns when you called it off the first time. It’s too late to change your sodding mind now, so fucking suck it up, dickhead.

Awww, and you’re not happy with your disgusting body? Well that’s a pisser, let me just cry you a little fucking river. Newsflash, you’re fucking OLD and you’re fucking married, nobody’s ever going to look at your shitty body again anyway, get the hell over yourself. Teen angst on a thirty-year-old is so not cool. Grow the fuck up.

Aaaaand you’ve got no friends? Well you are pretty fucking irritating, I can’t say I’m surprised. No offence.

Life’s not supposed to be easy, you whiny little shit. Oh, and you can stop doing THAT while we’re at it, it’s fucking stupid. Five minutes of calm, five days of shame, I’d have thought you would’ve learned by now. You never fucking learn, do you, you must be a special breed of stupid. Don’t think nobody knows either, of course they fucking know, they just don’t say anything because it’s fucked-up and weird.

If you’re going to do it you can just fucking do it, lose all the pathetic whiny tears and don’t bother talking about it.

Oh, and do us all a favour and fucking do it right this time, moron.