time to let it shine in 2013-2014

First things first:

I bought a wedding dress.

Bought, bought. As in, it’s hanging in my closet. As in, it is fully paid for, cash. As in, I keep thinking about pinning an angry face to the garment bag with the caption stop fucking eating if you want to wear me again.

Yup. That’s mine.

I got it for $99 off the rack. In size 8. It’s originally priced at $599.

It’s been three days and I’m still squealing to myself. Under size 10! Under $100!

The undergarments for the dress, and the accessories I’m adding to it (beaded cap sleeves and a shiny belt/sash) brought it $318 total. I still have to get it altered: the cap sleeves attached (just snaps) and hemming. Once all my stuff is in–everything but the dress itself had to be special ordered–I’ll get my alteration consult. It’s kind of funny to me that my slip is size 10, but my dress is an 8. I could have been a 6–shoot, even a 4 in some styles–but my rib cage is freaking enormous.

I was not super excited about it all. I was actually kind of overwhelmed. I had Heather to figuratively hold my hand, and a stylist to rig me up and laugh off my verbal clumsiness and paralyzed indecision. The dress is very warm (no fabric breathes) and I turned pink and red at some points. They had me ring the damn bell. I was really glad when it was over. It wasn’t until we drove away that the delight began to seep in through the numbness: I have a wedding dress!

The commitment phobia occasionally whimpers, reassuring itself that it’s okay, I can wear that at any wedding of mine. It needs to shut up and die already.

The dress purchase also came with a card for $40 off Aaron’s tux/suit rental. You’re welcome, dear.

Our next stop was a store we originally only hit because they had Alfred Angelo, Heather’s second-favorite designer. We found the dresses she had in mind for bridesmaids (that were quite pretty), but we both fell in love with a Venus dress instead. It’s gorgeous. It’s perfect for everything. We both want it just because, we both want it for bridesmaids, and Kacy (other bridesmaid) thinks it’s awesome.

I want it in purple; Heather’s wedding colors are still undecided, but potentially burgundy. I am not sorry for size; check out that detailing. It is magic for waistlines.

And then after all the dress trying-on, we went to IHOP and commenced a weekend of eating like total starving gluttons. I regret nothing. My body is confused, but my brain is flailing and stomping on the satiety button. Moooore! We also ordered pizza. And ate at Steak & Shake. It was a delicious, delicious weekend.

Sunday we went jewelry and makeup hunting. We got a sample foundation for me to try that turned out to be too light, and didn’t find any jewelry within price range. I’m sure I’ll find something purple and on sale in February, so I’m not worried. However, passing Zales, I saw the signs for the bridal semi-annual sale. Our rings are 25% off right now, and since I signed up for their email list, I get another $50 off his ring. I could knock $100 off his ring price for that. The problem is that I have since paid bills and gone grocery shopping for November and I am sooo out of money! He might get mine right now, because mine’s almost twice the price of his, but I might need to wait until the Christmas sales to let my bank account recover. Thank God I have a smaller, warmer apartment in a warmer state, so my heating bill will be significantly smaller.

Monday was a bit stressful due to traffic and road work. Grr. I spent another ton of money stocking up on food for November and couponing like mad–it’s actually half pet supplies, because the assholes decided they both needed everything this week: cat food, cat litter, dog food, fish oil… That’s almost $50 right there. Thanks, furbags.

Once I got home, though, Aaron was there, didn’t let me carry the heavy stuff up two flights of stairs, and we had delightful cuddle sessions all night with muttered I missed you this weekend and it was lonely walking into church without you admissions.

Tuesday was uneventful except for the part where I could have been busted for selling out to a scammer, except for the email chain I had telling me to proceed with the order. PAPER TRAILS. ALWAYS, ALWAYS PAPER TRAILS. Crisis averted, but the semi-heart attack was real. I have since worked out. I have done laundry. I improvised a fairly awesome dinner. I stocked up on more recipes for future dinners. I’m showered. And I am, in all likelihood, going to bed early.

WEDDING DRESS.