Judgement in Current Events

One day, I’m going to snap. I’m going to drag my roommate into the kitchen by the ear to show her what a kitchen looks like after I’ve been in there all day.

This is demure, this is mindful. See how I cleaned up after myself? Very cutesy. Very mindful. It is ready for the next person. Very mindful of bugs and rodents. We’re not like the other apartments. We don’t have flies in the suite. I’m not like the other emotionally dysregulated adult teenagers with ADHD. I have values. I don’t leave my mess for someone else. I am not shameless.

What is wrong with shame? It is a human experience. Some things we should be ashamed of. Should be embarrassed about. Standards aren’t all toxic.

While I’m judging, it is so menacing to visit a friend’s house who has kids old enough to clean but their place is a mess. Make your kids clean it. People used to have lots of kids to help take care of the farm. That is the whole point of having the summer off. Now we can’t get kids to take care of a living room? I can’t. My mother was a single mother of 4. There were many epic battles of her making us clean the house but we did in fact clean the house. Now, we are adults with clean houses. Very mindful, very cutesy. My siblings make my nieces and nephews do the same.

Organized chaos. Seeing piles and piles of whatever makes my eye twitch. We are grown folk. Grow the fuck up and take care of your shit. They can doom scroll for hours and then tell us all about how much time they don’t have. Not cutesy, not mindful.

I’m a Capricorn with a Taurus rising and my moon is in the 6H. Very earthy, very critical. Very organized. I take care of my body because it is the earth. So it is just in my nature. I keep my opinions to myself. Very mindful, very considerate. I keep the peace. But damn, it gets hard to sometimes when I see adults living like spoiled children. Mommy is not coming to make you do it. We have to parent ourselves.

Anyway, today is the big day! I leave in an hour. My nerves are not shot. I just want to get on with it already. I’ll go do some yoga and eat breakfast.