In the Life Log - Day 4 in My Musings

Last night’s sleep was the most decent so far; I think I was able to get about almost 9 hours’ worth. While today did not have (much) crying fits, a huge wave of anxiety and panic hit me again just a few seconds after waking up, so I had to get myself ready for work.

That said, work was still not very busy today. I opted for a few trainings just to keep myself distracted, as I also needed the continuing education points for my certifications, anyhow. I continued the project that myself and another colleague were working on for our lead as well; that took about 2 hours so not too bad, I’d say.

Workout went pretty good as well. While I was still not at my best, I seemed to have breezed through the training session, not to mention I had a bit of my appetite back too (I’d say about 50%).

It was during the cardio session that I again, was re-reading our old messages, and got sentimental in the process. A number of questions popped into my mind - “what if I was more considerate for her, given her workload and schedule?”, “I should have not contributed to her stress/pressure”, and the list goes on. But then again, these are all in hindsight.

I can only pray and hope that she’s trying to get enough sleep and eating on time as well since the past few weeks/months have really been busy for her. I miss her terribly.

Overall rating for the day: 3/10