All out on the table in The OpenDiary (OD) Days!

All out on the table! - 10/30/2005

<font color="#cc99ff">Woohoo!  I can’t beleive it’s another weekend.  I love days off.  I got home from work today, finishing at 5:30pm, and prettty much crashed on the bed.  I fell asleep until around 11pm, and I’ve woken up and am watching Golden Girls.  Haha, yes yes I’m gay ok? Leave me alone. :P</font>

<font color="#cc99ff">I haven’t put any of my jokes up in a while, so I guess I should get back into the habit.  Some I’ve found lately have really cracked me up, including this one hahahaha.</font>

<font color="#cc99ff">I hear voices - probably some drunk people at the train station, which is right near my house.  Sounds like they are having fun!  I was meant to be out tonight but after falling asleep, and waking up again, it doesn’t really put you in the mood for going out.  I need some time off to myself I think - I really like being by myself a fair bit, it allows me to think things through.</font>

<font color="#cc99ff">I freaked out at work today.  Luke came over last night, and basically I laid it all out on the table.  I told him the exact situation I was in, including the Aaron situation, and he listened intently and never gave up on me.  He even messaged Aaron on my phone, to find out where he and I stand.  He was sending messages on my phone to him, and wouldn’t tell me what he was saying.  I later read that he wrote, ‘hey it’s luke, i was wondering if I could have a chat if that’s ok’.  Aaron replied, ‘hey..i’m with people at the moment, what you wanna chat about’ Luke wrote, ‘oh i just want to know where you and matt stand, as you know i still like him but he is afraid of hurtin’ you so want to know where you stand and what’s going on’.  Aaron replied, ‘we are friends…i like him as a really good friend but i don’t tyink we would be right for each other if our relationship became anything else’.</font>

<font color="#cc99ff">Wow, so basically Luke put me in a situation where I no longer had anything holding me back on going out with him again.  I told Luke I felt like a coward, cos the messages were from him and not even from me, but Luke was so insistant on saying he’ll get over it.  Yeah so everything was out - I told him I was scared of a relationship but if there was anyone I would be with, it’d be him.  We slept together that night, but were up til early hours of the morning, and we both had 7:30am starts this morning.</font>

<font color="#cc99ff">Aaron messaged me today, so that was good cos i thought he might be mad.  But he seems his usual self.  I guess he’s glad I’m not that into him more than a friend as well.  He’s too much of a flirter anyway haha, and that’s what’s great about him!  He wants to go see a movie on Tuesday night, so that’ll be good cos I haven’t seen him in a while.  I told Luke that I’m going to the Christmas party with Aaron, and Luke got worried about that, saying that at Christmas Parties, there’s ‘alcohol and partying’ - haha.  I’m so looking forward to it.  Luke and I aren’t going out again..yet..but it could get to that stage.  It’s just that, for example, this morning at work, I was really freaking out about it.  I don’t know why.  Maybe it’s my perogative, that guys only get one chance with me, or it’s something more deeply psycholgical, but the freaking out really isn’t healthy if I’m gunna be in a relationship again, and I can’t hurt Luke.  It’s just each time I tell him I’m stressing, Luke takes it upon himself that I don’t want him, and tells me not to make excuses.  See, this is why I like where I am now - being single I can’t hurt anyone - but I can, and that’s Luke.  GRRRR, why me?  I think if I hang aorund Luke as a friend, I may be able to get back to the way I once was with him, but us being too full on the way he wants right now, is just gunna cause me to crack.  I don’t wanna do anything near like the way I treated Mark.  Cos I compared the way I was feeling this morning to that today, and I didn’t feel good at all.  Guess I’ll pan out what happens.  I think he’s in toowoomba today.  He wanted to see me today, but I don’t think he can, so yeh that’s a bit weird.  Interesting.  I wanna do a whole lot of nothig this weekend.  Might go for another drive if I get bored - that’s what I did last weekend and it did me a whole lot of good - so good to get out on the road.  Might drive a bit further out though.  Have a great weekend guys! </font>

Notes: --------------------------------------------------------------------

That’s a great joke!

Everything will work out the way it’s supposed to…even if you don’t realize it at first.

-Phil [CollegeDude84] 10/29/2005 11:13:27 AM

Hey! I started to miss those jokes and I’m glad that you’ve got them back now!

It’s always too funny.

Glad everything is going alright for you. I haven’t heard from ya in a bit… thought you got lost. lol.

ttyl,
-James [Beez] 10/29/2005 12:50:47 PM

I write a whole entry for you and you dont even note it…i’m sad :( [C-Dub85] 10/29/2005 1:20:18 PM

matt, will you MARRY me? :-) [Prince Zidane] [p] 10/29/2005 1:37:41 PM

Hey its been awhile, lol its a long story for me but read my blog to find out. Well just wanted to say i hope things clear up for you, it looks like they are going to.

TTYL Randall [MplsGayboy1985] 10/29/2005 3:44:21 PM

Great Joke as usual Matt. Looks like things are finally starting to sift out a little bit, just keep your chin up, its all going to work out.

Huggs!!!

[GardenBoi] 10/29/2005 3:49:27 PM

Mark my word on this: Eventually you and Luke and gonna get back together! If I had been you I would have taken that hot dude to bed and sucked him dry!! Oh man, what a f*cking slut I am. LOL

Love ya Matt,

Ben [Taste The Rain Bow] 10/29/2005 8:07:30 PM

the jokes are back! [LegallyGay80] 10/29/2005 8:27:59 PM

I the happy good mood Matt!!!
Huggs Mermz
[Mermy] 10/29/2005 8:35:56 PM

I haven’t left a note in eons so, my question to you is just exactly how far away DO you and Luke live from eachother? I think that you sould rekindle the relationship w/Luke but slowly. Baby steps. You sound like you two are soul mates. [3daygomer] [p] 10/29/2005 8:50:48 PM

I believe I once told you that everything works out for the best in the end.

Remember that… no matter what, everything works out for the best. You just need to be able to aproach any problems with an open mind and understanding and compassionate heart.

Take care :) [Sole Doubt] 10/30/2005 7:34:46 AM

Personally, I agree with everyone else here…everything has to work out for the best in the end. It’s hard to imagine life if it didn’t. Have faith…and a good weekend! [broken.wings.] 10/30/2005 5:16:31 PM

hilarious joke…and i hope everything will get sorted out and become non-stressful. im glad luke messaged aaron to find out where you two stood. its always better to know where things are to get a good perspective on things. your a sweet guy and i know you’ll find an amazing guy....be it luke or someone else. :~) [PetiteAnge] [p] 10/31/2005 11:50:08 PM

Gosh, that has to be a relief. So…things are…good? Wow…sounds like you had a great conversation with Luke. How are you feeling about it? Well, I guess I’ll find out in your other entries. Gosh, I’m gone for a few days and I feel like i’m in a hole! =) Love hte joke! [yellow_bull] 11/1/2005 3:36:39 PM

[^v^SuGaBaBe^o^] 11/1/2005 5:00:48 PM

Last updated October 12, 2014