a whole host of issues in The Wonderland Years: 2014. Done.

um. so this whole. thing w/ my friend’s uh. leaving. brings up a whole host of issues for me.

it’s not just the way she went. [of, her own accord]. it’s that they ignored her. and also i’m pretty sure [I don’t actually know but from what I’ve read online which isn’t much] she was abused there. I don’t know how or what kind or how often or anything like that. so yeah you can see why i’m so angry. i’m v. against injustice. I’ve been there. I get it.
it all just seems so horrible and weird and not real. how she went and what happened at the place. she tried to get out but no one would listen so she took the only other option she had. similiar to cleopatra. the people at the school weren’t allowed to be in contact w/ their parents. or anyone like that. so it’s not like they could’ve told. an aunt they were close to or whoever.
yeah. you’d want to end things too. at least I would. I have actually. yeah she - evidently - had a hard life prior but that clearly didn’t make it better.
I relate to her. a lot bc of the abuse. bc of the depression. bc of the wanting to end things. damnit it’s sad.
I knew her like I said when I was in 5th grade. I don’t talk much about that time. I don’t. want to. it wasn’t a good time for me. but w/ this the universe is trying to tell me something. I might listen I might not. but if I don’t i’ll never come down from floating. from suspension. i’ll be running even more. avoiding. i’ller. I mean. I won’t have an anchor.
I want to stop floating. but I don’t.