so. um wow. physicals. in The Wonderland Years: 2014. Done.

I just learned something. Apparently when people my age have a physical they have a complete physical. I never have other than when I was little. and bc of this I always thought they just stopped giving them. no apparently not.

I mean I don’t want one. I already know what’s wrong w/ me and what to do about it. I don’t need to pay someone a fukload to tell me. also if they find out I have anorexia they might actually you know. do something about it. I have cuts from my anemia which is brought on by my anorexia. and if people ask about them i’ll just say I don’t know how they got there. no I know exactly how. I just don’t want people involved.

no see I think my mom’s the one who told them I didn’t want a complete physical. this bothers me bc it wasn’t in my control it wasn’t my decision. it’s like back when she told me if I ever fell pregnant i’d have to have an abortion. um regardless of whether or not I do or don’t have one. that’s my decision not hers. it’s my body. [btw i’m not pregnant and never have been].