Nothing More in The Song Remembers When

I used to post so many music entries, but I’ve pretty much stopped listening to music entirely. I think it’s actually something I saw coming.

I remember growing up, my grandmother never listened to music. The only time she ever heard music was when she played it (which was not often after her stroke since it was difficult for her to play with only one hand) or in church. My grandfather listened to ghastly vocal music for a while until he started listening to country radio in the 1990s. I remember when we went on a road trip to Orcas Island in Washington, the only CD he had in the truck was Sammy Kershaw’s greatest hits, and I know every word of those obnoxious songs now.

But I was always more interested in how my grandmother became the way she had because she had a ton of vinyl. The only secular album she had was The Barbra Streisand Album, but I never once heard her listen to it. Somehow this woman whom I was always told had this strong, intense connection to music had completely expelled it from her life.

I remember thinking that she always seemed so bereft that she had no music left in her life. Now that bereavement is in me.

I find myself not connecting with new music, too much. I mean, Padam is fine, Rush was fun… even Madonna’s two newest songs were largely boring because they weren’t her, they were partnerships.

But of course there’s an exception: Anberlin. They came out with an EP in 2022 and another EP in 2023. Their first new music since their break-up in 2014, and it’s exactly what I needed. I won’t say it’s like they never left because I’ve grown and changed, and the music they made now is both harder in its hard moments, and softer when the softness is needed.

It’s like a fusion of the punk-adjacent alternative I loved them for when I was young mixed with the depression moodiness of the trip-hop I listened to as an alternative to the harder stuff at the same time. I’ve always felt like the genres of music I loved from my generation faded away and didn’t live on like the music from the previous generations…

I’m glad Anberlin is keeping the sounds alive for me.

For some reason, the minute and a half of rushing water at the end of Nothing More is so calming to me. I get lost in the peaceful sound of the ending and it helps me pause.

Last updated August 26, 2023