Monday. in Since OD is shutting down....

We went and did breakfast and then probably won’t do much for the rest of the day. It’s definitely going to be early bedtime tonight because school starts tomorrow. I’m definitely excited for her but the first day always makes me emotional.

It’s going to be pretty hot the next few days. I’m ready to get it over with and then have some time where the weather isn’t uncomfortable. It does suck because it means winter is coming and I hate the snow and cold.

My daughter told me last night that her Dad was asking if I was single. This makes me incredibly angry because it’s none of his business. I’m sure he’s bored with that girl and being in a town that’s super boring but even if I’m single, that doesn’t mean there’s a chance of us being together. I don’t want him and I never did. It’s also not appropriate to be discussing that with a 6 year old.

I am frustrated about money and need to get something figured out. I’m definitely broke and need money for gas and I have to reorder my medications in a few days. Hopefully I can do instacart or something. Money is always a worry.

He tried to call Saturday and then sent a text last night for our child to call him. I’m just really conflicted on her having any more contact because all he does is say nasty things about me or use her to pry into my personal life. I just don’t think it’s healthy for her at all. I think he just gets way too comfortable with things and it’s creating problems.

Again with CS. I have filed for child support when my daughter was 3 weeks old. He owes thousands of dollars and refuses to pay it. He has a warrant for non payment the the warrant was issued 10/21. CS has done everything they can do about him not paying it but there’s nothing more they can do because he doesn’t have any assets and doesn’t respond to letters. I can’t do anything else but wait for him to either get a job or be picked up on the warrant. He is never going to be man enough to work because he constantly finds people that will put up with his freeloading crap.

It’s beyond frustrating that the guy doesn’t have to help take care of his kid or be financially responsible. I just want everyone, including him to come over and explain to me what I’m supposed to do about getting a job and not having help outside of school. I just think it’s bullshit that I have to have all the responsibility while all he does is talk shit about me to my kid.

Now, it’s the waiting game to see if she gets a spot in the afterschool program. Hopefully I’ll hear something right away Wednesday so I can start applying for jobs. I’ll have a better idea about what I’ll able to work once I know. I also need to find someone to help with her when I have to work and there’s no school. Everyone wants to bitch about people on welfare but there’s no other option.

It’s like my brother always has something negative to say about my situation but he’s another one that will not watch my kid at all. There’s time where he could absolutely help but won’t. But he’s the first one to sit around and talk shit about food stamps and all this crap too.