Just not feeling it in Rambling sane thoughts of the terminally me

It's just one of those days I guess
I'm a mess, get depressed like the rest
and the best they address
the great test of a life with a joy
so you try, go outside, see the sky
watch the magpie fly
and deny when you're down
that you feel so damned ground
into dust that you must just distrust
all the truths that you pumped in your vein
all in vain sent the message to your brain
this disdain that I'm giving
to a life so worth living
but that weight that I heave is
the lie I believe. I deceive
when I say that it all goes away
though I know it's a show
still I kneel and I pray
that this stay in my hand
is the silence of the band
and the note that I'll strike
is the dark turned to light
when the bright rises east
then I plead that this piece brings me peace from the lease of this beast that I hope to keep tamed in the moment that I shamed
since we all walk the same, talk in vain, let us say
that today for all that we're told we should shoulder it
just shrug our shoulders and say we're not feeling it.

Random stream poem with no editing guys. I'll probably clean it up later when my brain is fully functional.

Ramble.
Ramble.
Ramble.