Leaving. in Since OD is shutting down....

So my daughter is going with them and they’ll be here afternoon to get her. I told the girlfriend that as unfair as this situation is, I don’t want to add to it. I also think about the fact that my daughter and I’ve been together pretty much non stop for almost 2 weeks and this is probably the last time she’s gonna get to go with them before school starts. I’ve actually asked if she’ll keep her an extra day because I have my appointment and then I’m trying to attend a concert.

I’ve been thinking about the CS issue and wonder about mentioning us agreeing to a lump sum and then forgiving the rest. Apparently that’s a thing and it’s on Google. I don’t know her money situation or if they care about him working or getting rid of the warrant. My friend told me this morning that I don’t want to make it the topic of conversation every time and I should wait until she brings it up. I plan to leave it alone for now because I don’t know how to approach this or even if I should. He’s probably told her that I’m all about money and it probably doesn’t make me look super great that I keep talking about CS.

My daughter is taking her bath and I have to finish packing up her bag. She’s excited to go and I’m excited for her. I know I’m going to be pretty lonely while she’s gone but I also understand that she needs time with her Dad too. I also want to kinda break up the next 2 weeks until school starts. It’s definitely hard to find stuff for us to do everyday and it’s going to be nice to get a break for a few days.

My brother is going to be dropping his kid off with her grandparents over the weekend and they’ll be free as well. I’ll probably hang out with them as much as I can because I seriously don’t have any friends. I was talking to this guy yesterday who seemed super cool and talked about meeting up at a bar tonight but then changed his mind and asked me to come over. I quit talking and then blocked him this morning.

I just want to understand why men have such an issue meeting in public. I sit and wonder if it’s because they don’t want to put in any real effort getting to know you or they just don’t want to spend money. I also noticed how his demeanor changed after I agreed to come over. It’s like the nice guy mask dropped instantly. It’s funny how different things go once they get what they want. I don’t have people I don’t know at my house and I also will not meet someone for the first time at theirs.

This guy has a good job, a 3 bedroom house and a nice vehicle. Sad just how many are in a good place to be in a relationship but their approach is really fucked up. I have since taken myself off Facebook dating. I really want to find someone to hang out with while I’m kid free but it’s next to impossible to find someone worth a damn. I just don’t get why it’s so hard to find a man that is into meeting in a public place, at least the first time you meet them. I sit and wonder exactly what the reason is. I am not going to put myself in a potentially dangerous unsafe situation. I’m not that desperate or lonely. I still think for myself.

I’m just not into putting myself in a dangerous, uncomfortable, or potentially scary situation to appease someone else. Bad things happen to men too but it’s like they don’t care. I know I’m really big on not having strangers know where I live or come over the first time meeting them but men just don’t seem to think that it’s a big deal. I also wish that men could just be more honest and say that they just want to get it in and that’s why they don’t want to meet in public. I also wonder if they are trying to harm you or something.

I get tired of feeling almost as if there’s something wrong with me because I don’t want to meet someone outside of a public setting. It’s also irritating how men don’t want to risk spending any money buying you a drink or dinner. I just find it easier to stick to myself and not even try anymore.