I hate this in Just in Case

So today was the day we brought Mama to the nursing home. She’s been in bed for 4 days. Her speech was really slurred when I tried to wake her up today. There’s also a significant droop on the right side of her face. Physically getting her to the nursing home was hard. They were very concerned about her. Her blood pressure was down and her heart rate was super high. Because of the possibility of a stroke, they’re doing nothing by mouth. They’re giving meds under her tongue to regulate her heart rate.
So the possibilities are:
1- this is a tia that’s just hanging on and she will pull out of it
2 - this is a stroke and she will continue as she is
3- this is her starting to transition to the end
She’s lost 8 pounds in 2 weeks.
Seeing the faces of all of these people that know her, when they saw her today, was heartbreaking.
I need to cry. I need to scream. I need to break things. Daddy fell apart today after the struggle of getting her into the car. I can’t fall apart because he needs me to keep it together