Slowly in 2023

I went for brunch with your Mum and sister today. It was really nice to sit over coffee & eggs and talk about you, smile, and let our eyes get misty now and then.

I walked the two blocks home from the restaurant and tried so very hard to appreciate the beautiful sunny Sunday morning. I thought about walking another block from our apartment to the lake but … I didn’t.

I was home for a little bit before walking a block to a neighbours house to pick up a spectacular print he had on canvas of two birds flying through the sunrise over the lake. I love it. It reminds me of us ..

As Dee and I came home with the canvas, the tow guy was here for the truck. I tried to smile at him, and asked him what the plans were for her. He said it was up to me - if they would fix it to sell it or retire her to the wreckers for parts. I asked that she go for parts .. I don’t want anyone else driving her ever again. He nodded and said he would do that then, and she would never be on the road again. He said he knew how hard this must be for me, and gave me his condolences.

I came inside and cried all afternoon. Its so strange to look out the window and not see her parked there. So empty and lonely now.

Like the rest of this place, I suppose. Like me.