Child Support. in Since OD is shutting down....

But yeah, so basically I have to stay in good with the girlfriend if I want to see payments because there’s really not much of a chance for them to enforce because of where he’s working and where he’s living. I wish I would have not said much about the warrant. There was just so much going on at the worst possible time yesterday and my brain was on overload. I just struggle with how much control this guy still gets to have in all of this.

I just have to try and maintain and not internalize this shit. I let too much get to me and I need to just keep a level head. I think I may see a payment or two until the girlfriend just gets fed up and just deal with knowing that he’ll just end up owing and leave it at that. I’ve never been able to rely on him and as much as it isn’t fair, I have to keep going. I’d like to be able to dash over the Summer and plan to get a real job once school starts.

It’s crap to know that I’m going to have to get along with the girlfriend to see some money but it’s only going to last so long until she switches up on me or just gets tired of all of this. He’s going to just work under the table to avoid paying. I’d like to know if he plans on attending the hearing. He’s either going to say that he isn’t working or working under the table because either one is going to make him look like an irresponsible moron.

I was at my brother’s a couple of nights ago where he was still just trying to justify this for him and wanting me to make deals for him which I’ve tried! His girlfriend asked what he owed and I told her where she said, “well that’s not that bad” and it’s like okay well you gets upset when my brother owes you a dollar so I’m sure you would be screaming from the rooftops if you were owed thousands of dollars! I promised you would sing a different fucking tune if this was your situation! I think if people even an ounce of sympathy I wouldn’t be nearly as angry!

It’s just insane how little empathy there is left in this world. People just don’t care unless it’s them to go through shit. I’ve taken care of my child with little to no help from her Dad since the day she was born and people still think I should basically pay him to be involved with her?! Um no, no one has EVER had to beg me to be present or sober to be a parent so it’s not cool I should be expected to have different standards for him. I’m sure people could argue that he was on a bender and he just didn’t care so he should get a free pass. I don’t care. I’m done trying to make deals and be reasonable. He’s going to be held accountable where child support is concerned and that’s the end of it.

So they didn’t give her the antibiotic they were supposed so I have to pick her up and take her back to the dr today because I called and they said she may need a different medicine. I’m severely irritated. I don’t want to have to drive clear across town yet again for the same ear infection. But she’ll be off the antibiotic before she goes with them again so we’ll be good there. It’s just annoying that they ‘forgot’ to give it to her when it was a once a day thing! I knew I should’ve been sending a reminder text everyday but I was trying to just instill some trust and credibility here but this is what I get!

But yeah, I’m sure I might see a payment or two until the girlfriend either gets tired of this or decides to switch up on me and then I’ll get nothing. It’s like my friend said this morning as long as I see payments I’m fine but I know I’m only going to see them for so long and that means he’s still in control. I’d rather just see them getting garnished because then it’s not just what they feel like sending and whenever it’s decided. I also think it’s bullshit the deals I’ve tried to make because that was saying that I was trying to rip myself off by offering to forgive back child support to get him support his child in another way. If someone has to negotiate with you to help take care of your kid, you have already failed at life.

He’s just always felt he shouldn’t have to contribute anything to his own child and I feel he’s gotten other people on that bandwagon. It’s infuriating. I’m going to keep doing what I can to hold him accountable and I don’t give a flying fuck what happens to him. He’s never cared what it’s been like for me to take care of her and it’s been hard. I have always made sure that she’s take care of even if it’s meant me going without and it’s a slap in the face that he goes above and beyond to avoid paying because it isn’t my daughter that’s affected, it’s ME!